Pickles, pieholes, and Karl Rove

You just gotta love Karl Rove. The man is truly an evil genius. If only we had someone like him on our side!

What makes Rove so diabolically successful is that the playbook where he gets all his dirty tricks is basically the same one we all used when we were kids trying to survive on the playground -- only he brings to bear all the money and power of the Republican Party. Hence, even as the mierda from l'affair d'Plame makes sucking sounds on the soles of his tasseled loafers, Rove has launched a counterattack -- on MoveOn.org!

Doug Ireland reports in his blog Direland, that Monday's issue of the Capitol Hill newspaper Roll Call has an article about the GOP's new Rove-inspired smear campaign, which attempts to label MoveOn "soft on terror." According to Roll Call,

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"These attacks appear to have two purposes: One is to put the group and its Democratic allies on the defensive over support for the war on terror. And the second is to drive a wedge between Democratic candidates and the millions of dollars that MoveOn's supporters have pumped into their campaigns. With MoveOn fast becoming one of the Democratic Party's most important fundraising sources, the second goal may end up being the more important one."

Writes Ireland, Karl Rove is "hoping to hang the successful e-fundraising operation around the necks of Democratic candidates all across the country like a terror-tinged albatross."

This is Rove's way of saying, Hey, I may be a sleazy, treasonous goon, but so what: MoveOn is worse. MoveOn is unpatriotic! (Playground Retort #27: "I-know-you-are-but-what-am-I?")

Meanwhile, the Democrats are lining up to shoot poison spitballs at Rove and demand that he be fired on the basis of Bush's promise two years ago that he would can whoever was responsible for leaking Valerie Plame's identity. (Playground Rebuttal #5: "But, you promised!") The White House, however, has been tightlipped, perhaps following the axiom that if you can't say something nice about someone, don't say anything at all. If only Karl Rove had done the same and kept his piehole shut, he wouldn't be in such a pickle today.