Jim Newell

Scott Walker and Jeb Bush Try Trumpism: Unsurprisingly, They Just Look Like Dopes

Maybe Bill Kristol was right: this GOP field is just one dope after another, trying to out-dope each other, failing, and letting America’s ultimate dope comfortably expand his lead.

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Donald Trump Is Tearing Conservative Media Apart - And It's Delightful to Watch

While you all presumably have been having “fun” living your “fun” lives, I have been reading conservative media Twitter tear itself apart and man, it is GREAT. Want me to fill you in? No? OK, here’s how it’s going down.

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Pope Francis Makes Tea Party Heads Explode - Why Louie Gohmert and Steve King Have It in for the Pontiff

The Bishop of Rome is coming to Washington in September to address a joint session of Congress, and boy are things already getting frisky. Pope Francis is an extraordinarily popular Pope who’s not afraid to wield that popularity for human rights and economic justice. In other words, he’s well to the left of most members of Congress, and he may well get up in their faces about issues near and dear to him. Since you’re sort of required to clap for the Pope, this is going to make for an interesting scene.

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2016 Gets Even Dumber: The New York Times Worries that Jeb Bush's Weight Loss Will Doom Him

Jeb Bush is rapidly losing weight, and the New York Times is on it. The former Florida governor has lost 30 pounds since December on the Paleo diet, the fad du jour where you eat only things cavemen ate, like rocks and dirt and the flesh and brains of your vanquished foes from the nearby heathen tribe. Also: salad.

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Gabby Giffords Really Doesn't Care that Gun Nuts Call Her 'Mean' for Fighting to Spare Others from Being Shot in the Head

A few years back someone walked up to then-Rep. Gabrielle Giffords outside a Safeway in Tucson, Arizona, and shot her in the head. The shooter, Jared Loughner, killed six and injured a dozen or so others. In 2012, another nut shot up a movie theater in Aurora, Colorado. Later that year, a shooter walked into a Newtown, Connecticut, elementary school and murdered 20 children. These are only a few high-profile examples of the dozens of mass shootings that have taken place in the last several years.

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How GOP-Dominated Kansas Is on the Verge of Unthinkable Upsets

Just as the various Senate prediction models were solidifying around Republicans taking control of the chamber this November, a Democratic pickup opportunity in … Kansas? … has become a possibility? A real possibility, at that — none of this “well umm we could pick up a seat in Mississippi?” buck-raising pablum that the Democratic Party will throw around every now and then.

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Rick Perry May Have Executed an Innocent Man, But Dopey Press Loves His New Glasses

Rick Perry is just so… adorable. And hardworking. And charming!

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The Right’s New Enemy No. 1: How the Chamber of Commerce Became Toxic

Rep. Kerry Bentivolio is a freshman House Republican who’s facing a primary challenger on Aug. 5. Yesterday afternoon, he pulled what some might call a “campaign stunt.” He returned, and made a big fuss about returning, a Chamber of Commerce “Spirit of Enterprise” award given by the top business lobby earlier this year. Not that it’s much of an award — the Chamber gave them to 205 members this year, and Bentivolio got one even though the Chamber has endorsed his primary opponent.

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Why the Wingnuts Are Waging War Against Michelle Obama's School Lunch Program

The congressional battle to save America’s children from the scourge of nutritious school lunches and reinstate the Old Guard of frozen pizza and chicken nuggets is heating up. And since first lady Michelle Obama is now participating, the level of argument should devolve from “school lunch personnel have some concerns about the implementation of new regulations” to “ARGLE BARGLE ELITIST BWWWARRR!” in short order.

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