Reporter Jeevan Vittal of Spectrum News NY1 caught up with Sen. Rand Paul yesterday and asked him a few questions about Paul’s attempts to block funding for the 9/11 Victim Compensation Fund.

Oh, it went a little like this:

VITTAL: What is your objection to the bill? Sir, what is the objection to the 9/11 bill that you had on the Senate?

PAUL: …

VITTAL: Are you going to vote in favor of this bill, Senator?

PAUL: …

VITTAL: Sen. Paul, do you agree with the assessment that Sen. Gillibrand was making that you’re standing in the way of first responders receiving their benefits?

PAUL: ...

VITTAL: Senator, are you going to do any further blocks or amendments or objections to this bill?

PAUL: ...

VITTAL: Senator, did you have a chance to meet with any of the first responders who came to Capitol Hill yesterday?

PAUL: ...

VITTAL: Do you have anything to say to the first responders, sir?

PAUL: ...

VITTAL: Sen. Paul, is there anything you can say to the first responders who came yesterday?

PAUL: If you watch Fox News, we just did an interview on Fox News and there’s a lot of good information on there. If you’ll tell your viewers to tune into Fox News, we have some great stuff on there …

VITTAL: With all due respect, sir, I’m not Fox News, but can you paraphrase really quickly …?

PAUL: Well, if you’re a professional outlet you can call and get an interview like they did.

VITTAL: Sir, we tried multiple times.

PAUL: I don’t know who you are; who are you with?

VITTAL: I’m with New York 1. Sir, what is your objection to the bill?

PAUL: Here’s my objection, if you would like to be sort of a professional reporter …

VITTAL: Will all due respect, sir, what is your objection to the 9/11 first responder bill?

PAUL: If you’ll call and get an interview it would be a great idea.

VITTAL: I understand you have issues with the national debt. Is that your objection, sir?

PAUL: If you watch Fox News, you’ll see that we explained exactly what the lies were. So watch Fox News and …

VITTAL: Do you mind clearing that up, sir? What do you mean by the lies?

PAUL: …

VITTAL: Is there anything else you can tell us, sir?

PAUL: …

VITTAL: All right, thank you, Senator.

A few observations:

  1. Who tells a reporter to go watch Fox News? That's like asking Jackson Pollock to carefully observe what your kid just did with his Wooly Willy. The only reason to tune into Fox News is if you have an unslakable thirst for commemorative coins with Ronald Reagan’s face on them.
  2. If Paul’s case is so strong, why can’t he even attempt to explain it?
  3. THIS is how all Republicans should be handled. Forget about storming Area 51. Everyone storm Rand Paul’s office until he explains why tax cuts for the ultra-rich are okay but helping 9/11 first responders is socialism.
  4. Why does the deficit only seem to matter when the money is going to regular working people?

Thank you, Jeevan. That was awesome. More please.

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