News & Politics

Did We Quit When the Tea-Baggers Bombed Pearl Harbor?

No! But now we can't beat the surrender monkeys of Old Europe?

Logan Murphy is right that Lawrence O’Donnell was pretty perfect in his interview of cobweb-brained townhall goofball Katy Abram.

Good stuff and of course we need more of it. But it strikes me that all the patient hand-holding of wingnuts through to logical conclusions isn’t gonna cut it if we want to see health care reform actually pass … there just isn’t enough time.

We need a home run message. It needs to turn the tables on these assholes and put them on the defensive for once. And it can’t be wonkish — it’s got to be simple and inspiring, a way to capsulize what the fuck this whole thing is about in a way that can win over the fence-sitters and shut up the obstructionists.

And that message is right there in the numbers, right in front of our faces:

Life expectancy at birth (years)

1. Japan — 82.6
38. USA — 78.2

World Health Organization’s ranking of the world’s health systems (2000)

1. France
37. USA

Then all we need to do is put those numbers into perspective, e.g.:

Now I don’t know why quitters like Sarah Palin and second-raters like Newt Gingrich don’t think Americans are smart enough and tough enough to beat the goddamn French and Japanese on living the longest. But I for one say that we can do it. And if those asswipes don’t fuck it up with their whining and their second-guessing, we’re sure as hell GOING to do it.

Goddammit, this is the country that marched into France and took care of their Nazi problem for ‘em! And now Sarah Palin is telling us that those Frogs are better than us at kicking the shit out of germs and cancer and friggin’ heart disease? The fuck they are! That goddamn Wasilla quitter may be scared of a challenge, but I’ll put my money on real Americans having the stones to square off against a bunch of existential philosophers.

Who’s with me?