News & Politics

Between the Bushes A Father to Son Chat

What do the 41st and 43rd presidents of the United States talk about when their golf cart leaves the journalists behind?
Wearing a hat with the number 41 stitched on it, at a golf course near their vacation compound in Kennebunkport, Maine, Former President George H W Bush gave his son, President George W Bush, a matching hat with the number 43 on it, in celebration of the kid's 55th birthday. Reporters were allowed to snap some photo ops but were then forced to retreat. Imagine the conversation they missed.

43. Nice drive old man. Looks like it squiggled down near that bench over there. Oh yeah, got to thank you for the hat. Saw you had a number 44 made up for Jeb. Is Neil getting 45?

41. No, he asked for 69. Now son, I'm just glad we're able spend some quality time together. Vis a vis, you and me, one on one, that is.

43. Hey look at that squirrel. Let's throw tees at him.

41. Now George, pay attention here, its important that you and I, you know, the two of us, talk about the summer session coming up.

43. Aww dad, you said Dick was supposed to take care of all that junk. Toss me that water bottle, I think I got him cornered.

41. I, unh, well boy, you know this, unh, whole thing isn't turning out to be as easy as we thought. What with Dick having his heart problems and all.

43. You could say problems, yeah. You should see people freak out in Cabinet meetings everytime he turns blue. Ashcroft especially. Gets all huffy. Thinks Cheney's mocking him. But that pacemaker is cool. Sometimes when he's nodding out, and I have to leave him a note about something really heavy going down, I just clip it to a refrigerator magnet and pop it right onto that garage door opener. Makes a nice snap sound. Snap! Snap! Snap! I like the smiley face ones. Sometimes by the time he wakes up, there's a whole bouquet on his chest.

41. That's enough. We got to get serious here. We might have played the oil hand a little early there. I don't know if you noticed, but our polls are dropping faster than a sparrow dragging a container car full of coal. You have to get back out there for some more photo ops communing with nature.

43. Oh, man, I never saw you wading around in bear crap.

41. Yeah, and look what happened in 92. That's not going to happen to you mister. By the way, how come the twins aren't up here for your birthday?

43. Oh, I don't know. Laura says they got a gig on South Padre Island filming some TV show called "Girls Gone Wild." I think its a sequel.

41. That's nice. You still got the little bugger in your sights?

43. He's somewhere in that tree.

41. Excellent. Get Karl to bring the hose. We'll flush him out. Pretend he's Jeffords.

43. Use the 5 iron dad. Its your best stroke.

41. 10-4.

If Will Durst had a number it would be 100. For bottles of beer on the wall.
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Election 2018