'How could you prosecute the Hamburglar?’: New Kamala 'controversy' sparks 'confessions'

29 August 2024

The Washington Free Beacon, a conservative website, on Thursday published its latest investigation into Democratic politicians: “‘I Did Fries’: Kamala Harris Claims She Worked at McDonald’s, but She Never Mentioned It Until She Ran for President. Did She Really Toil Beneath the Golden Arches?”

The Beacon’s 1220 word exposé is complete with screenshots of the former San Francisco District Attorney, California Attorney General, and U.S. Senator’s “October 1987 job application for a law clerk position in the Alameda County district attorney’s office,” front and back, including signature, and a screenshot of her résumé.

“Harris’s résumé a year after she graduated college makes no mention of McDonald’s,” according to the Beacon, despite her recent appearance on The Drew Barrymore Show, “during which Barrymore’s sidekick, Ross Matthews, threw a softball at the vice president.”

The softball question: “I heard a rumor that you worked at McDonald’s?”

“‘I did work at McDonald’s,’ laughed Harris. ‘When I was at school … I did fries. And then I did the cashier.'”

“‘I didn’t know that about you,’ gasped Barrymore.”

The Free Beacon reports, “Neither did anyone who followed Harris’s long career in public life—that is, until she ran for president in 2019 and began to make the job a centerpiece of her biography.”

Fast food work is hard work. Workers are often underpaid, sometimes scheduled to work long hours, and sometimes in very early morning shifts or late into the night. But their plight and hard work until recently have not usually been seen as praiseworthy – or worthy of being on a résumé for a job as a district attorney. That may have changed, especially since the coronavirus pandemic, although Vice President Harris, the Free Beacon reported, revealed her McDonald’s job earlier.

The story, written by three Free Beacon reporters, is making its way around social media circles, and eliciting some comedic and some angry responses, as well as some revealing confessions.

“Yes, of course, the first thing law firms look for when they examine resumes is a stint at McDonalds,” snarked writer and comedian Frank Conniff. “How could you ever prosecute the Hamburglar without that experience? And forget about a political appointment from Mayor McCheese.”

It seems others, too, have left off summer, high school, and college jobs from their résumés.

“My first real summer job in high school was working food service at the San Diego Zoo,” explained Ernie Tedeschi, former Chief Economist for the White House Council of Economic Advisers. “Every resume template & explainer in existence tells you to keep your CV tight and relevant and not to waste the employer’s time, so I can’t remember that job ever appearing on my resume.”

“True story,” revealed professor of law and author Jennifer Taub. “I worked serving popcorn and soda drinks at a movie theater in high school and never put it on my résumé. I also waited tables in college for special banquets and that never made it to my CV.”

“Guess I better disclose my fraud now,” quipped Human Rights Campaign national press secretary Brandon Wolf. “I worked at the Banana Republic outlet for a heartbeat as a teenager. It was an awful experience that doesn’t make it onto my resume and didn’t appear in my memoir.”

Ebony Jade Hilton, MD, an MSNBC medical contributor, inventor, and co-founder of consulting firm shared her story: “I feel the need to confess that I left @footlocker off of my resumé when I applied for my first job as an Anesthesiologist.”

“In college,” attorney Aaron Reichlin-Melnick, a senior fellow at the American Immigration Council acknowledged, “I worked for Aramark part-time flipping burgers and doing line cook work for four years. I even spent most of a summer in my home town working the salad/dessert station in a local restaurant 4 days a week. I’ve never once put those jobs on a resume.”

The Nation’s justice correspondent Elie Mystal, a frequent MSNBC guest declared, “I started my own snow shoveling business when I was 13 called ‘Melt 4 You’ but I’ve never put that on my CV, and I don’t call myself a former ‘small business owner.’ I guess I’m a fraud too.”

Jeff Timmer, a political strategist and Lincoln Project senior advisor snarked, “I leave out a roughly 30-year period where I helped elect Republicans. Instead, I say I was in prison. Makes things less awkward.”

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