Ted Cruz's College Roommate Has a Hilarious Response to News the Texas Senator Liked a Porn Bot

The internet went insane on Monday night after Sen. Ted Cruz’s Twitter account liked a video posted by a porn account.


The controversy that erupted from this inspired Craig Mazin, a screenwriter who was Cruz’s former college roommate, to rant about the misery of living with Cruz and his fetish for “mediocre porn.”

“Imagine Ted Cruz is doing this four feet below you in the bottom bunk bed,” Mazin said of Cruz’s porn-watching habits. “Sadly, the fact that Ted Cruz jacks off to mediocre porn spam is the most human thing we can say about him. This is actually his high point.”

Mazin then expressed empathy for the rest of the world now that it knew about the Bible-thumping Cruz’s love of pornography — but he said he felt better knowing that he was no longer the only person to carry knowledge of this dark secret.

“I never wanted this for any of you,” he wrote. “I thought maybe I’d feel better if two or three people knew. Not six billion. That said? I FEEL BETTER.”

Mazin has also pinned an old tweet from April 2016 that mocks Cruz’s purported love of masturbation.

Enjoy this piece?

… then let us make a small request. AlterNet’s journalists work tirelessly to counter the traditional corporate media narrative. We’re here seven days a week, 365 days a year. And we’re proud to say that we’ve been bringing you the real, unfiltered news for 20 years—longer than any other progressive news site on the Internet.

It’s through the generosity of our supporters that we’re able to share with you all the underreported news you need to know. Independent journalism is increasingly imperiled; ads alone can’t pay our bills. AlterNet counts on readers like you to support our coverage. Did you enjoy content from David Cay Johnston, Common Dreams, Raw Story and Robert Reich? Opinion from Salon and Jim Hightower? Analysis by The Conversation? Then join the hundreds of readers who have supported AlterNet this year.

Every reader contribution, whatever the amount, makes a tremendous difference. Help ensure AlterNet remains independent long into the future. Support progressive journalism with a one-time contribution to AlterNet, or click here to become a subscriber. Thank you. Click here to donate by check.

Close
alternet logo

Tough Times

Demand honest news. Help support AlterNet and our mission to keep you informed during this crisis.