'Read the F*cking Emancipation Proclamation': Stephen Colbert Schools Trump on the Civil War
From the White House that brought you alternative facts, now comes alternative American history.
On Monday, President Trump mused that Andrew Jackson might have prevented the Civil War, a suggestion that can generously be called bizarre. That evening, "Late Show" host Stephen Colbert felt compelled to straighten him out.
"Exactly, Andrew Jackson said, 'There's no reason for this,'" he deadpanned. "He said, 'We don't need a Civil War, all my slaves are perfectly happy.'"
"Now — and one rarely hears this — in fairness to Andrew Jackson, I'm not surprised he didn't stop the Civil War, given that he died 16 years before it started," Colbert added.
In the same interview, Trump also wondered why the Civil War had to be fought at all.
"It's one of the great mysteries of our time: Why was there a Civil War?" Colbert quipped. "Also, who murdered the Titanic? We'll never know... And because we can never know the cause of the Civil War I think that —"
"Slavery!" a cartoon ghost of Abraham Lincoln interjected. "Read the f*cking Emancipation Proclamation. Come on, people. I mean, seriously, how many times does Daniel Day Lewis have to tell you, it's slavery. Knock, knock, who's there? The Union Army come to free the slaves, you brain-dead pumpkin."