Dumb Things Donald Trump, Fake Presidential Candidate, Has Said Just This Week
Congratulations, America!: Donald Trump says he might run for President again.
Or rather, to put it more accurately, Donald Trump is again going around saying he might run for president.
In an interview with the Washington Post, the reality TV star tried to assure readers that his latest presidential talk is about affecting real political change, and not a crass and pathetic attempt at maintaining a semblance of relevance.
“Everybody feels I’m doing this just to have fun or because it’s good for the brand,” Trump said. “Well, it’s not fun. I’m not doing this for enjoyment. I’m doing this because the country is in serious trouble.”
Um, Donald Trump does realize that we haven’t forgotten like, everything he’s ever said and done, right? Because it seems like Donald Trump is pretty sure we’re all idiots.
Let’s revisit a handful of the ridiculous things Donald Trump has said in just the last week:
1) On the Oscars. Donald called into "Fox & Friends" to toss off a few gems.
“There was a lot of conservative hatred there – there’s no question about that,” Trump said. He then stated that unlike the liberals over at the Academy Awards he “[hadn’t] seen any conservatives get up lately and start ranting and raving.”
So Donald Trump hasn’t read the Internet or watched TV or had any contact with media in very long time. Fine. But then, in response to wins for "Birdman" and its director Alejandro GonzÃ¡lez IÃ±Ã¡rritu, Trump stated:
“Well it was a great night for Mexico, as usual in this country...It was a great night…for Mexico. This guy kept getting up and up and up. I said, you know, what’s he doing? He’s walking away with all the gold.”
The Mexicans are stealing all the gold? And you're using "gold" as a poorly obfuscated code word for "jobs," yes?
Though you can't hear it on the recording, Trump concluded his remarks by singing “America! Fuck Yeah!”
2) On Obama and Israel. While being interviewed on conservative Hugh Hewitt’s radio show recently, Trump was asked if he thinks Obama is a friend of Israel.
“No, I think he’s one of the worst things that’s ever happened to Israel,” Trump said, as if we thought he might answer any other way. The he claimed to know Netanyahu very well – well, he calls him “Bibi” – and kept right on talking:
“[S]o many friends of mine, they contributed to the Obama campaign. I said, because they’re so pro-Israel, I said, 'How can you contribute to the campaign? This guy is the worst thing that ever happened to Israel.'”
And then History Professor Trump demanded to see Obama's birth certificate again.
3) On Vaccinations Causing Autism. In the same interview with Hewitt, which is an embarrassment of riches, Trump decided to give science a spin, and pontificated on how large vaccine loads can cause autism.
“I am a total believer in getting the shots,” Trump began, before spotting a shiny object on the ground, picking it up, and putting it in his mouth. He then went on a rant about how “massive innoculations” have taken our “autism rate” to “a level that it’s never been.”
“And all I’m saying is spread it out in smaller doses over a longer period of time,” said Trump.
"So you believe there’s a causal connection between vaccines and autism?” Hughes asked.
Trump answered: "[I] know at least two people, one of them who works in the building that I’m in right now, a beautiful woman, has a child. The child is 100% healthy, takes the child, who was, I think, around a year and a half or two years old to get the shot, gets this massive shot of fluid pumped into the baby’s body. And a few days later, catches a fever, and all of a sudden, is severely autistic. And many people, many people have had that experience, Hugh. And I will tell you, on Twitter and on Facebook, where you know, so many people, I feel, it’s sort of interesting, because I get so much response, people are praying for me that I at least say that.”
I'm sure he meant to say "...praying to me."
Anyway, you can listen to the remarks in their entirety, below.