Conservative Genius: No Need to Fight Global Warming, Cause an Asteroid Might Hit Earth

With Limbaugh et al. steadily redefining "conservative" to mean "crazy, racist paranoiac", it's a good thing Conservatism's intellectual elite have their shit together, or the movement would be in real trouble. Take, for example, Jonah Goldberg, who has crafted an elegant, irrefutable argument against efforts to curb global warming.

Here's how it goes: AN ASTEROID MIGHT HIT EARTH! (so there's no point in investing and working to stop the effects of global warming.) Seriously. That's basically his argument.

Spurred by last week's discovery that a large object had slammed into Jupiter, Goldberg grimly (though excitedly) fantasizes a cataclysmic scenario cobbled together from some Michael Bay/Jerry Bruckheimer movies:

The space flotsam smashes into the solar energy farm formerly known as Arizona. The space rock, 100 meters in diameter, hits at 50,000 mph with the force of thousands of nuclear warheads. Millions die. Dust and debris blot out the sun and will chill the planet for years. Crops fail, billions starve. The heat of impact releases torrents of nitrous and nitric acid rain.

So horrendous is the calamity that some even wonder if the enormous investment in fending off climate change might not have been better spent.

Alas, there's no time to defrost Al Gore's frozen head to ask his opinion.


Understand the importance of honest news ?

So do we.

The past year has been the most arduous of our lives. The Covid-19 pandemic continues to be catastrophic not only to our health - mental and physical - but also to the stability of millions of people. For all of us independent news organizations, it’s no exception.

We’ve covered everything thrown at us this past year and will continue to do so with your support. We’ve always understood the importance of calling out corruption, regardless of political affiliation.

We need your support in this difficult time. Every reader contribution, no matter the amount, makes a difference in allowing our newsroom to bring you the stories that matter, at a time when being informed is more important than ever. Invest with us.

Make a one-time contribution to Alternet All Access, or click here to become a subscriber. Thank you.

Click to donate by check.

DonateDonate by credit card
Donate by Paypal
{{ }}

Don't Sit on the Sidelines of History. Join Alternet All Access and Go Ad-Free. Support Honest Journalism.