Obama to Appoint Republicans If He's Elected? What You Talkin' 'Bout Barack?

Is it too late for me to take back my Obama vote?


Obama is hoping to appoint cross-party figures to his cabinet such as Chuck Hagel, the Republican senator for Nebraska and an opponent of the Iraq war, and Richard Lugar, leader of the Republicans on the Senate foreign relations committee.
I'll be so depressed if he takes this "bipartisanship" nonsense seriously. Personally speaking, I'd like any Democratic candidate to spend their whole first day in office standing atop the White House roof dressed in pirate garb shouting "NOOOOOOOO PRISONERS!!!!!" at the top of their lungs. I want someone who will appoint Rudy Ray Moore as a Supreme Court justice, who will punish the Keyboard Kommandos by passing a Constitutional amendment banning Cheetos and Funyuns, and who will look into every Republican's eyes and tell them that he drank their milkshake. HE DRANK IT UP!!!

As I've said before, there are more important issues facing this country than my bloody-minded quest for revenge. But even if Obama doesn't plan on systematically destroying every Republican by using the Justice Department to slap them with bogus corruption charges, he could at the very least not appoint any to his cabinet. And while it's true that Hagel and Lugar are some of the least objectionable Republicans out there, they are still Republicans. They bear the taint; and though not prosecutable in law, in custom and nature the taint cannot be ignored.

No prisoners, Hussein X. Please don't disappoint me.

AlterNet is a nonprofit organization and does not make political endorsements. The opinions expressed by its writers are their own.
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