Turkeys again refuse ceremonial White House pardon

Struggling to absorb his own abysmal approval ratings and the Republican party's landslide defeat in the midterm elections, George W. Bush took another shot to the gut yesterday when both birds designated by Bush as the National Thanksgiving Turkeys, refused the president's ceremonial "pardon."

"Flyer" and "Fryer" who hail from the Lynn Nutt farm in Monett, Missouri, were formally pardoned by Bush in a ceremony today at the White House, marking the 59th anniversary of the Thanksgiving tradition.

But both white-feathered birds made it clear that they would refuse the president's pardon, citing fundamental disagreements with Bush-administration policies and the legacy of last year's pardon recipients, "Yam" and "Marshmallow," who broke new ground in the turkey community by spurning Bush in 2005.

"This wasn't an easy decision. I mean, hey, I used to be a Republican," said a pugnacious Fryer in an interview on Tuesday evening. "But this guy Bush being both a Chickenhawk and a lame duck is an insult to all birds. Even turkeys have standards."

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