Kim Jong is the Il-est
"Guys, exciting news on the Kim Jong-il front!" writes Chelsea Peretti.
According to...er.........an article "on a Web site run by North Korea":
Ã¢â‚¬Â¢ Kim surprised a group of North Korean officials attending a meeting in 2002 by recalling all their phone numbers "with lightning speed."
Ã¢â‚¬Â¢ On a day Kim visited a cemetery, he looked around at the tombs and he remembered the achievements, characteristics, tastes and bereaved family members for hundreds of the dead by a quick glance at the names on tombstones.
I guess I just want to know more about webmaster "North Korea."
Ã¢â‚¬Â¢ Kim pilots jet fighters, pens operas, produces movies and accomplished a feat unmatched in the annals of professional golf by shooting 11 holes-in-one on the first round he ever played.
Aw, come on. Try harder, propaganda people, you can do BETTER!
Ã¢â‚¬Â¢ The first time KJ had sex a baby was instantly born -- he is that fertile.
Ã¢â‚¬Â¢ He can smell an apple from up to ONE THOUSAND MILES AWAY.
Ã¢â‚¬Â¢ When he did not like rain he made it go away.
Ã¢â‚¬Â¢Top of Mount Everest: every day.
Ã¢â‚¬Â¢ KJ can make up to 80,000 crepes at a time, both sweet and savory. Doesn't matter to him! Easy. Whatever you like.
Ã¢â‚¬Â¢ Can cry on command.
Ã¢â‚¬Â¢ Won Iron Chef every time he competed, which was every time it ever aired!"
Yeah, but can he clear brush? (Huffington Post)