What's your name, fool?

Attention, citizens. Our beloved friend of recent years, War on Terror, has officially changed its name to Global Struggle Against Violent Extremism. Yes, it is a mouthful, but wise men in the Bush administration had no choice but to make this difficult but important decision.

The problem: the "war" bit doesn't work quite as well any more. Once a reminder of our awesome ability to turn entire nations into rubble, the word is today tainted by a somewhat less comforting reference to that thing that's not going well you know where. As for terrorism, why offer free publicity for our enemies, especially when they seem to be doing quite well enough by themselves with all those suicide bombings. And best of all, as Fred Kaplan points out in Slate, G-SAVE is so much more uplifting.

You think I'm kidding? Not.

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