The Warrior Moth

So George "Top Gun" Bush hits the deck of an aircraft carrier in full battle attire, and leaves in a suit. Get It?! The warrior caterpillar matures into the diplomat moth. Genius public relations move. Simple. Uncomplicated. Obvious. Next week, maybe he can do a reversal on "The Little Mermaid" and grow a tail.

Then he flew to a defense plant in Santa Clara, California and said the unemployment rise to 6 percent is the very reason Congress should pass his tax cut because it will create jobs. In the space of one day, he's morphed from the Potentate of Symbolism into Captain Segue. Tax cuts creating jobs. Yeah, right, and corporate bonuses fund school hot lunch programs.

Hasn't anybody noticed in terms of creating jobs, the last tax cut tanked like a double wide in a free fall off a hairpin turn on the way up to Pike's Peak. That's the typical agenda: Connect two totally disparate cause and effect links, then get increasingly strident about it. And presto: instant policy. It does make one wonder: What other spurious couplings can we next expect to be trumpeted by Fox News anchors and other administration flunkies?

  • Condoms are responsible for teenage sex.

  • Faith based charities are an effective replacement for government social programs. Got to be the right faiths, of course.

  • Pre-emptive strikes encourage pro-Americanism around the world.

  • The liberal myth of corporate greed is what is really causing the recession.

  • Once Country & Western radio stations are convinced another nation's leader is a bad guy, we got policy.

  • Anti-war dissent is the reason Saddam is still alive.

  • Anti-administration dissent is the reason Osama bin Laden is still alive.

  • Homeless people are the result of failed 1960's policies.

  • Medical marijuana causes junkies to kick and rob old people.

  • Looting Social Security means money will always be available from Social Security.

  • The class warfare of criticizing tax cuts as favoring the rich is deepening the rift between America's benevolent bosses and its little people.

  • Democrats are the friends of our enemies.

  • Allowing more pollution results in cleaner air.

  • Susan Sarandon was always an uppity bitch.

  • Fuck the poor.

Will Durst is not a friend of the enemy but our enemies' enemy thinks he is. Okay, he's poor. Happy?

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