Norma Jean: Nothin' But the Dog
Nothin' But the DogI'm drawing a blank all day about this week's column, running home to view Barbara De Angelis' "Making Love Work" Videos, thumbing through "relationship books," and then suddenly I lifted my son's pillow and brought it to my face and inhaled. Ah, here it is.Isn't one of the deciding ingredients in a relationship, or in falling in love, our sense of smell? New friends either intoxicate, repel, or leave us ho-hum, simply by the quality of aroma wafting off their clothes and skin. Haven't all of us at some time, mourning the loss of a lover or suffering from geographic distance, find ourselves sniffing at some old shirt or sweater that a lover left behind? I once found a friend of mine sitting in the clothes closet of her absentee boyfriend, crying. I still save a cashmere sweater from a man I fell in love with at first sight/whiff and whose essence remained in it for years! I wore that sweater everywhere hoping somehow by wearing it I could milk our good chemistry and seal the bond. I wonder now if it was simply his pheromones that caused me to fall head over nose in love with him.Author Leil Lowndes in her book How To Make Anyone Fall In Love With You, scientifically dissects, into 85 bite-sized pieces, and over 52 chapters, very specific techniques for getting a "quarry," as she refers to the desired object, to fall in love with you. In the final chapter entitled, "The Final Stone Unturned," she discusses the power of pheromones on erotica and falling in love.Let's face it, the eyes meet first. Then they drop down to the butt like instinct, as he/she turns away; yet it's that place right below the eyes that plays a crucial role in establishing attraction, according to Leil Lowndes.Lowndes' scientific look at love includes studies on the "power of lipstick," the everlasting first impression, "first date bonding" and many other factoids that hook the quarry into spending the rest of their life with you. As for smell-sense, she states: "Half a dozen respected scientists think they've discovered a new sense organ in our nasal cavity called the vemeronasal organ, or VNO. ... it is nothing more than a tiny pale pit near the bottom of the septal wall dividing the nose. This minuscule dent is reported to detect chemical signals passing unconsciously between people."Chemical signals or not, stale perfume, too much aftershave or stale body odors turn people off -- or "on" in some cases. Napoleon reportedly sent a letter imploring Josephine not to wash her underarms as he planned his return to Paris. Vive La France, eh? But in many of the personal ads, people stress cleanliness indicating good hygiene as a most important factor in mating.Who nose?