Norma Jean: Go Fish

Go Fish! "Trouser Trout." Say it slowly, "Trouser Trout."Any red-blooded heterosexual woman, or homosexual man for that matter, has to admit there's something mildly obscene about the sound of these two spoken words; makes you want to touch one, no?It's a fact that women do very well in today's world without a man, but a woman with a dedicated mate who sports an able body, sharp mind, biking shorts and makes time to please has a smile on her face and an undeniable glow to her cheeks. Hence the inspiration for A Girl's Pocket Guide to Trouser Trout: Reflections on Dating and Fly Fishing by Gail Rubin, the complete resource for locating where these lunkers lurk, casting a line and landing a keeper. In her informative, fun to read book, Rubin discusses the pleasures of landing a "big one," the art of trolling and casting and hooking a "catch-and-release" variety of fish. An expert angler herself, Rubin views fly fishing and the search for Mr. Right one in the same sport. Not only are the approaches, techniques and language similar to actual angling, but fish definitely resemble the male species in physical attributes and habits.She claims, "It's the detail that makes the difference between a keeper and a fish that gets tossed back."By studying each of two dozen types of fish, from the glorious Rainbow or Golden trout, to the lowly blowfish and bottom feeder, Rubin draws very intelligent parallels between fishing and dating styles. Does your guy have the stamina of a steelhead yet characteristics of a Cutthroat? Can you tell the difference between a talkative Sea trout and an egotistical Blowfish? Is that Carp (constant complainer) draining you?Rubin informs the reader what types of waters to cast for specific species of males (clubs, hot spots, environs, e-mail, etc.) and also goes as far as to match goddess archetypes (a la Jean Shinoda Bolen) with various fish."Brook trout are 'family men' while the 'Golden' is an exclusive type; remote, rich and hangs with his own kind. 'Rainbows' sport a full range of colorful characteristics and are energetic go-getters with an active lifestyle, and put up quite a fight when hooked. 'Sea trout' are the salty dogs; travelers prone to wander in various ports of call; usually pilots, politicians, entrepreneurs and sailors." Rubin identifies Robin Williams and Bill Clinton as Sea trout, whereas Shaquille O'Neal and Andre Agassi are typical Rainbows.Some gals engage in dating just for the thrill of the hunt, practicing catch-and-release fishing exclusively. Others think only "Bottom Feeders," "Piranhas" or "Blowfish" (egotistical farts) inhabit the waters of newspaper personals. Rubin placed her own ad in the Personals and proves otherwise, as she discusses fishing this particular stream."Starting to fly fish for trout is like falling in love. The early gratification's, be they kisses or rising trout, are heady and decidedly unscientific. They exist of the moment, and for the moment, that's enough. Sooner or later things calm down a little, and as the infatuation continues you want to know more." John Merwin, The New American Trout Fishing Your wild Wahini!For a copy of "A Girls's Pocket Guide to Trouser Trout: Reflections on Dating and Fly Fishing," by Gail Rubin. E-mail:, or call, 505-265-7215.

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