CHICKEN LITTLE WAS RIGHTA 72-year-old Israeli man trying to commit suicide in Tel Aviv jumped headfirst from the third floor of a shopping mall. He landed on cafe patron Max Dadashvili, 26, fracturing several vertebrae in Dadashvili's back and neck but suffering only a minor head injury himself. "We were drinking, eating, laughing -- and suddenly someone fell onto me from above,'' Max Dadashvili, 26, told the Yediot Ahronot newspaper. "I fell back with my chair, got a tough blow in the back and lost consciousness.'' The jumper got up and was about to walk away when Dadashvili's friends stopped him and called police.CURSES, FOILED AGAINJames Scott, 20, who broke out of a south Georgia jail where he was serving 25 years for armed robbery, was arrested a month later in Sacramento, Calif., after bragging about his escape in a bar. Lowndes County Sheriff Ashley Paulk said Scott was carousing with a group of people when he nodded off, enabling one them to call police.SHORT-SIGHTEDThree Ethiopian hijackers, armed with an ax, a fire extinguisher, a bottle of whiskey and something they claimed was a bomb, took over an Ethiopian airliner as it left the capital of Addis Ababa bound for Kenya. They demanded that the pilot fly to Australia, ignoring his explanation that the plane didn't have anywhere near enough fuel. Two and one-half hours later, the plane ran out of fuel and crashed into the Indian Ocean just off a resort beach near Mozambique. Two of the hijackers survived the crash, along with 52 other people aboard.In Owensboro, Ky., a Davies County Road Department driver tried to drive a 20-ton dump truck across a bridge with a posted weight limit sign of three tons. He made it half way across before the bridge collapsed.Police in Andover, N.J., reported that a 47-year-old man and his 38-year-old wife were slightly injured when they lit a stick of dynamite inside their car and went to toss it out, only to realize then that they had forgotten to first roll down a window.SEEMED LIKE A GOOD IDEA AT THE TIMEOne man was killed and another injured at the Calcutta zoo on New Year's Day after they decided to put a marigold garland around the neck of a 13-year-old male Royal Bengal tiger in celebration of the holiday. The two men, who authorities said had been drinking, entered the tiger's enclosure by crossing a moat. About 1,000 people witnessed the event.NAME GAMEA Michigan judge denied John Jakubowski's request to change his name to "Kiss My Ass." Jakubowski explained that he sought the change to protest years of conflicts over local laws, property rights and property taxes. The judge said that he believed Jakubowski wanted simply to "hide behind the name as a way to use the expression," suggesting a scenario of what would ensue if he was stopped by a police officer for a traffic infraction.REASONABLE EXPLANATIONThe New York State Corrections Commission suspended state prison guard Glenn Goord without pay in December after it was brought to their attention that he had been flying a Nazi flag from the porch of his home. Goord told a local newspaper that he was not a racist or a Nazi, but flew the red, black and white banner simply because, "I like the colors."GOVERNMENT-THINKIn an effort to increase the supply of nutrients in the water for the growth of younger salmon, Oregon's Department of Fish and Wildlife started stocking 26 coastal streams with dead salmon.BOTTOM GUNNavy investigators revealed that a crash of an F-14 jet fighter was caused when the plane's pilot and navigator removed their helmets and oxygen masks and put on their cloth garrison caps and posed, saluting pilots in a nearby plane who were taking their picture. The two died from a lack of oxygen after they also shut off the plane's oxygen supply to cut down on the noise during the "stunt." By the time they turned it back on, it was too late.PRIVILEGE OF OFFICEConnecticut State Rep. Donnie Sellers Sr. was accused of taking a $200 bribe from an undercover policeman who posed as a food stamp thief in search of a gun permit. According to prosecutors, Sellers can be heard on the policeman's hidden tape recorder boasting, "I'm a politician. I ain't turning nothing down."NO TIME TO BE THINKINGWomen's brains shrink during the third trimester of pregnancy, New Scientist magazine reported. They don't return to normal until several months after the birth.STENTORIAN DEFENSESvein Harald Folleraas, deputy mayor of the southern Norwegian village of Songdalen, was hunting rabbits when he was charged by a moose protecting her young. "I unleashed a tremendous shout,'' the politician told the Oslo newspaper Verdens Gang. "The moose instantly collapsed onto the ground, a meter (yard) from me.'' After a few seconds, the stunned moose staggered to its feet and wobbled quietly away, according to the newspaper, which said witnesses corroborated Folleraas' account.GOOD NEWS, BAD NEWSPolish fashion model Agnieszka Kotlarska, 24, was booked on TWA Flight 800 from New York to Paris last July but canceled at the last minute, avoiding the fate of everyone else on board the plane who was killed when it exploded off Long Island. The following month, however, Kotlarska was killed after a man attacked her outside her home and stabbed her three times in the chest.HOT TO TROTSan Diego police charged Tammy Jo Garcia, 27, with 25 counts of arson in the past two years, explaining that fires stimulate her sexually. Two men, identified as Garcia's lovers, were also charged, one of whom admitted starting fires to impress Garcia so she would have sex with him.PRACTICE MAKES PERFECTThe University of Toronto's medical school hires people to pretend to be patients for its students to practice on, paying them between $12 and $35 an hour. Top dollar goes to Bob LeRoy, 45, who submits to rectal exams and explained, "I always hope the student with the biggest finger goes first."Compiled by Roland Sweet from the nation's press. Send clippings, citing source and date, to POB 8130, Alexandria VA 22306.