Hightower: Mayor Giuliani's Bunker

Mayor Rudy Giuliani of New York City is a banty rooster kind of guy who seems to think it's his crowing that causes the sun to come up every morning.Not only is he full of himself, but he's been making a pest of himself recently, strutting around and demanding that everybody behave like he tells them to. For example, he didn't like the way New Yorkers cross the streets without going to the correct corner and waiting for the walk-sign to flash before moving through the cross-walk. So this Big Apple Big Shot has banned jaywalking in a city where jaywalking is considered a First Amendment right. Of course, New Yorkers have flipped him off and continue to walk as they want. More recently, the Mighty Mayor has taken on a beloved, New York icon: The hot-dog vendors, and all the other sidewalk entrepreneurs who purvey everything from knishes to umbrellas from their colorful carts, literally giving the City its unique flavor. Too messy, pronounced the prissy pontiff of proper decorum, so he's out to sweep the sidewalks of them.Now, though, His Giuliani-ness has made a move that has dropped the jaws even of jaded New Yorkers. At a time when he's cutting funds for libraries and child-care centers, Giuliani is spending $15 million of the citizens' money to build a [quote] "disaster" bunker for himself. This state-of-the-art facility will be bulletproof, plus it'll be able to withstand bomb blasts and hurricanes. It'll have its own electrical generators, a place to cook, and beds and showers for Giuliani and his family. He'll also have his own secure "red phone" so he can talk to the President, the Pope or whomever he might need to call for help. The Mayor's $15 Million Big Apple Bunker also will feature ergonomically designed furniture and special lighting to prevent headaches.This is Jim Hightower saying ... The Mayor claims his private bunker is necessary in case of an urban disaster ... but I think he's building a hiding place from those outraged hot-dog vendors.


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