Durst: You Can't Make Stuff Up Like This

Now, Michael Jackson wants to move to Scotland. I'm not sure thisguy should be allowed to move to a country where little boys wear skirts.Sarah Fergusen has signed a contract to be spokesperson for WeightWatchers, based apparently on her experience of shedding the dead weight ofEnglish Royalty.America On Line is being sued by a group of subscribers since itinstituted its new $19.95 a month for unlimited busy signals. Anheuser Busch dropped the Budweiser frogs after complaints thatthe ad campaign appealed to children. I suppose they're going to bereplaced by a rag tag mob of tiny purple dinsoaurs. They moved the State of the Union address from February 5th, toFebruary 4th so it wouldn't interfere with the Miss Universe Pageant. Iguess they're afraid America wouldn't be satisfied watching just one boob.Noted scientists claim the universe will disintegrate in 30 billionyears. Which obviously won't affect most of us. Except those still hangingon for AOL technical support.A book of Hillary Clinton quotes is due soon. Don't know what thetitle will be: "It Takes A Subpoena." or "The Shredder is Mightier Than TheSword" are my suggestions.Will Durst says it is better to lose the American Comedy Awards for aseventh time than not to.

Understand the importance of honest news ?

So do we.

The past year has been the most arduous of our lives. The Covid-19 pandemic continues to be catastrophic not only to our health - mental and physical - but also to the stability of millions of people. For all of us independent news organizations, it’s no exception.

We’ve covered everything thrown at us this past year and will continue to do so with your support. We’ve always understood the importance of calling out corruption, regardless of political affiliation.

We need your support in this difficult time. Every reader contribution, no matter the amount, makes a difference in allowing our newsroom to bring you the stories that matter, at a time when being informed is more important than ever. Invest with us.

Make a one-time contribution to Alternet All Access, or click here to become a subscriber. Thank you.

Click to donate by check.

DonateDonate by credit card
Donate by Paypal

Don't Sit on the Sidelines of History. Join Alternet All Access and Go Ad-Free. Support Honest Journalism.