DURST: This is News?
Yeah, yeah, I know. People are getting inaugurated all over the place and we got ourselves what you would call a brand new lineup of lying cheating reprobates runnings things. It's a brand new year, the President is being impeached, our jets are getting fired on in the Middle East but the number one news story today? The cold snap in the Midwest. Imagine that. Cold in Minneapolis in January. Well, well, well. What are the odds?This was news? The lead story? What next? Summer Heat? The Pacific Ocean Moist? Ants at Picnics? Dirt in Wyoming? Potatoes Au Gratin in French Restaurants on the East Coast of Ireland? John Tesh on PBS? Hair Spray in New Jersey? Blue Haired Ladies Hogging the Nickel Slots in Vegas? White Starchy Thighed Tourists in Orlando? Jimmy Buffet in Key West? Airline Main Cabin Food Lacking Seasoning? Inferior Plumbing in Bosnian Crack Houses? Eric Roberts as a Bad Guy? Low Primary School Test Scores in Mississippi? Inflated Cost Estimates on Baggage Door Repairs by Defense Contractors? Strom Thurmond Making Unintelligible Remarks? Beer Stains On Basement Couch Cushions in Milwaukee? Crimes Against Rayon by Silicon Implants in Hollywood? Undercover Espionage Agents Posing as UN Weapons Inspectors? Overpriced Hula Dolls With Yellow Crepe Hair Made in Taiwan Available at any Hawaiian ABC Store? Robert Vaughn with a Bad Rug? El Grande Half De-Caf Non-Fat Milk Lattes in the Shuttle Teminal of Sea-Tac Airport? More Partisan Crap Disguised as Party Leadership Press Releases in DC? Hopelessly Nihilistic Black and White Stab Yourself In The Head Films from Sweden?Will Durst is simply shocked.