DURST: Swallow This...NOT

Alternet.org
April 26, 2000

You Can't Make Stuff Up Like This.Instant Replay is being used by the NFL. Of course at Dallas Cowboy games, coaches can access the extra angle the DEA surveillance cameras provide.Hillary denies seeking plastic surgery. Said she doesn't want to be "someone she's not," while on her stump tour of New York in an effort to represent their needs in the US Senate.A British court allowed the extradition of Chilean dictator Augusto Pinochet to stand trial in Spain. Still unsure how a conviction would affect his CIA pension.Linda Tripp is suing the White House and Pentagon for invasion of privacy. No, that's the entire joke.Kenneth Starr is scheduled to clean out his office next week. Imagine he's off to Afghanistan to teach the Taliban how to be puritanical.George W's denial of doing illegal drugs suspiciously stops at 1974. And what was Dad's job during that time? Head of the CIA. So, what are the chances the drugs George W doesn't deny doing were the same drugs the CIA didn't bring in during what wasn't the Vietnam War?Senator John McCain officially announced his candidacy for President. After enduring more than five years of torture in a POW camp, one can only assume he developed a taste for it.Will Durst imagines Senator McCain has grown immune to the press.

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