DURST: Jonesboro and the NRA

"And now in light of the Jonesboro tragedy, let's get the response from the NRA spokesman, Rock Hardney"."Thank you Ted. And of course all of us in America agree, an anguish it truly is. Although I must say, the biggest tragedy to me was only the eleven year old had enough target practice to be trusted as a sniper. But good Goddam, that kid had a good eye. We're talking six head shots, four kills and 10 others down out of 27 shots at over 100 yards away. Not bad for a fifth grader. I tell you what, I could have used that boy in last year's Junior Shoot Off. And I think you effete Liberal press should be ashamed for politicizing calamities like this, blaming guns as the bad guy again. What were these kids doing with deer rifles anyway? Children that size should have been wielding smaller caliber firearms. You and your pansy hair helmeted friends don't want to admit it, but the fact is Ted, if the rest of the schoolkids had been armed they would have been able to defend themselves and return fire. At least the teachers should have been packing. So as a patriotic gesture we at the NRA announce the forming of a fund that will provide every teacher in the country with a .457 magnum equipped with hollow points. It's the least we could do to put this national nightmare behind us."

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