Durst: Desperately Seeking a Scapegoat

Oh come on, get real people. The timing of the bombing strikes on terrorist bases in Afghanistan and Sudan had nothing to do with Clinton's, shall we say sticky, problems back home. And roasted cigarette filters on cream cheese make tasty h'or doerves. And the Warner Brothers Network is destined to replace the BBC for sophisticated adult programming. And the Black Republican Caucus is going to draft the party's year 2000 platform. In a phone booth.Clinton claimed he was trying to pre-empt other terrorist attacks and had "compelling information they were planning additional" ones. Of which I have no doubt. I'm just wondering which maniacal despot he's talking about: Osama bin Laden, or Kenneth Starr.Bin Laden is the moneyman behind the World Islamic Front for Jihad Against Jews and Crusaders, which needs a new name like Al Gore needs immunity. I guess that means we here in the U.S. are Crusaders. Alright! Time to put on our chain mail and search for the Holy Grail. We've already proved we will respond to wanton slaughter with wanton slaughter. Sounds like the Crusades to me.This isn't Wag the Dog; this is more like Good Will Hunting or Desperately Seeking Saddam. Runs the risk though of looking like Dumb and Dumber.Will Durst wonders if Hillary snarled: "You're not bombing anybody, mister. We're on vacation."

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