DURST: Couch Potatoes With a Purpose

ABC just announced an agreement with American Airlines to give frequent flyer miles for watching certain television shows on the network's schedule. Oh yeah, that's just what we need. Couch potatoes with a purpose. "Honey, why don't you go outside and play." "Can't mom, only two more NYPD Blues and I bump up to Business on my non-stop to Paris."You know this is the start of something big and hideous. Already you can get frequent flyer miles by eating at certain restaurants or ordering flowers, but now we've managed to turn our greed into a passive sport. It's the ultimate dream marriage for Americans: watching TV while accumulating at the same time. I can see the future unravel in front of me like a ball of yarn rolling down the stairwell of the Washington Monument.* Japan Airlines, and Nintendo get together with a Donkey Kong Junior starter program where kids get miles for completing different worlds in a given time.* Southwest Airlines works a deal with Charmin Bathroom Tissue and the inside of the cardboard roll reveals a mileage coupon.* Joe Camel in co- operation with British Airways switches from Camel Bucks to Camel Miles.* Continental Airlines and Duncan Hines gives miles for every pound a person gains in a three month period; the largest gainer wins a million mile prize.Will Durst wants a round the world award. Heh heh.

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