DURST: Clinton on Race

Race. Unless you're talking about a living room to kitchen during the commercial break contest on who gets the last piece of pie, its not a very pretty word. To say it has a tendency to get people riled up is like calling a mile wide infestation of poisonous red Carpenter ants; irksome. Bill Clinton has sought to initiate a yearlong nationwide discussion on race, which most likely means a marathon session of honing our name calling skills into a fine subtle precision. But except for naming a blue ribbon commission the President weighed in with less specifics than you'd get on the side of one of those Ginseng Tea boxes. Newt Gingrich, never one to let sleeping dogs lie, managed to kick every cage in a kennel when he jumped in with the "can't we all get along" response speech he presented to the Orphan Foundation of America. Yes, Newt Gingrich was speaking at the Orphan Foundation of America. You can't make stuff up like this. What I think the Prez should propose is this. Once a year on their birthday, everyone uses all the drugs and stimulants they want and then stagger into an airplane hangar that's been outfitted with mattresses and Barry White music but no lights, and nobody gets out until they have had sexual congress, and in two generations everyone will be approximately the same color. Of course it might sound better coming from me instead of him. Will Durst's birthday is March 18th. Who's in?

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