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Corporate Accountability and WorkPlace

The 1-Minute Therapist: How to Deal with a Bad Boss

By Karen Salmansohn, Huffington Post. Posted July 26, 2007.


If you have a bad boss, before you pack up and leave, consider these "Bad Boss Improvement Strategies."
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I onced worked at an agency where the owner (we'll call him "Miller" to protect the not-so-innocent) Miller had such crazy mood swings, we jokingly referred to our agency as The Miller and Miller and Miller Agency.

Miller drove everyone nutso. Although the creative work we did was great, morale was low, and thereby exits out were rampant.

Miller is a perfect example of the famous axiom: "People take a job because of the company -- but leave because of bad bosses."

According to management researcher Chandra Louise, 80 percent of the employees who quit their jobs do so because of problems with their bosses.

If you have a bad boss, before you pack up and leave, consider these "Bad Boss Improvement Strategies."

1. Have an honest, brave talk -- with yourself -- not your boss! Fearlessly look at your behavior. Are you inspiring wrath or disrespect? If not, proceed onward.

2. Book your boss for their bad behavior. Get a journal and write a cathartic list of all the bad things your boss did/does -- and how each misdeed impacted your performance -- and others.

3. Rank your list from top outright evil to lesser plain ol' annoying. Pick the top three misdeeds and develop positive, helpful solutions. Edit out sarcasm.

4. Bring your "Problems/Solutions List" to trusted friends and colleagues. Discuss. Edit.

5. Find a "Mentor Boss" to help problem-solve your "Tormentor Boss." In every company there's at least one wise and non-gossip-oriented supervisor who understands company's needs and culture. Revaluate your "P/S List" with them. Edit again.

6. Schedule a meeting with your boss. Consider how there's "SAFETY IN NUMBERS" -- as long as added people you bring with you are "safe" (ie: able to discuss problems in a warm spirit -- not as a "group lynching.") By uniting with trusted, emotionally-balanced colleagues, your presented "P/S list" will have more impact on your boss.

7. Begin your talk by acknowledging how you're sure your boss is completely unaware of his/her actions -- and how you hope this meeting will be positive for all involved. Give your boss a typed-up copy of your "P/S List." Your boss will pay more attention knowing your talk is on documented official record.

8. Don't leave until everyone has appropriate expectations -- and a measurable way to gauge change.

9. Only as an extreme last resort should you report your boss to his/her supervisor or HR. Recognize if you do, you'll run the risk of being pegged a trouble-maker -- attracting new stresses.

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See more stories tagged with: boss, bad boss, work environment, work place

Karen Salmansohn is an ex Senior VP ad creative director (at age 27) who left her job to pursue her passion of writing -- and is now a best selling author with over 1 million books sold, with titles like How to Be Happy Dammit; Enough Dammit; How to Succeed in Business Without a Penis; Gut: How to Think from the Middle to Get to the Top.

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Always remember: have an exit stradegy.
[Report this comment]
Posted by: KaptainSpiffy on Jul 26, 2007 3:55 AM   
Current rating: Not yet rated    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
We're all living through the consequences of the lack of planning can cause.

And if, in fact, it turns out it's not your boss, it's you.

[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]

HIDE A DIGITAL RECORDER
[Report this comment]
Posted by: Roverton on Jul 26, 2007 6:52 AM   
Current rating: Not yet rated    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
All bullies HATE being exposed! It is their greatest fear.

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A good start
[Report this comment]
Posted by: saretto on Jul 26, 2007 7:24 AM   
Current rating: Not yet rated    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
This is a proactive, assertive approach to a solution with a boss. Most adults should consider it. Creating and bringing solutions to the table is always a good thing.

However, when you bring solutions again and again to your boss and they still don't change, you can hide a digital recorder OR you can stick it out for two years, get your resume professionally re-done and quietly quit during their busiest season after obtaining a better job.

I stuck it out with people who had no training and liked to micromanage. I looked at my issues with authority and broke down what the solutions might be (additional training for managers, additional training on new products and programs for us who were interacting with the customer, the list had about 48 things). None were entertained, discussed or implemented.

If you go to HR, guaranteed in 2 months they will replace you if not sooner. YOU have the problem, not the manager. I worked for a 300+ employee telco company. We had a sales manager who had two lawsuits against him for threatening employees. He was never fired. He never 'left for personal reasons'. He was placed in charge of the corporate sales teams for the next two years.

I agree that this would be a start in the process. But in all seriousness, your friends would tell you to find another job and your employer would assume lay you off and find someone without a problem, who didn't challenge their choice of manager.

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» RE: A good start Posted by: RaW
Gee
[Report this comment]
Posted by: VannaLaRoche on Jul 26, 2007 7:22 AM   
Current rating: 5    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
Now if it would only work in DC.

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This is a joke, right?
[Report this comment]
Posted by: CarolL on Jul 26, 2007 7:54 AM   
Current rating: Not yet rated    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
Are you kidding? In the last company I worked, step #6 would have resulted in the mentor boss warning me against the whole thing, and I probably would have been fired by the time I got to #7, certainly by #8. It doesn't matter if the employee acts like "an adult" if the boss isn't an adult, too. He's in his position to run your dept according to his goals, not yours. Showing him how his policies are interfering with his goals, while seemingly pragmatic, only puts him on the defensive.

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When all else fails...
[Report this comment]
Posted by: truthteller on Jul 26, 2007 8:06 AM   
Current rating: Not yet rated    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
Videotape the offending SOB do something really, really wrong when they aren't looking, or are sleeping on the job, and post it to YouTube, and anywhere else on the internet you can think of to embarass management into firing him.

Of course, having a couple of years of net income FU money in the bank wouldn't hurt before you do this!

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MAYBE THESE PEOPLE NEED A HUG
[Report this comment]
Posted by: VZEQICVA on Jul 26, 2007 9:00 AM   
Current rating: Not yet rated    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
I can't believe that so much time is wasted trying to 'make nice' to people who have to learn to be civilized. It's an execise in futility, doesn't work and wastes company time. Supervisory jobs are about efficiency and productivity not yanking people around just because it's fun. They waste just as much time as people surfing the web and sending email. There are far too many booses to begin with. It's a job not an ego trip. Thanks, ANNA

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Personality disorders are hard to change
[Report this comment]
Posted by: drmeow on Jul 26, 2007 10:31 AM   
Current rating: Not yet rated    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
The flaw in this article is that it assumes that bad bosses can and are willing to change. This sort of advice works with irritating bosses - bosses who make some mistakes but are basically good people. However, with a few exceptions, most of the "I have got to get another job" type of bad bosses I've had most likely have personality disorders. One of my current bosses (a clinical psychologist) has a narcissistic personality disorder with elements of histrionic and psychopathic personality disorder just to make things worse. He is dependent on me so does not pull the same level of **it with me as he does with others and I've put myself in a position of running interference between him and the rest of my staff (as in, don't tell him when things go wrong, tell me, we'll fix it, and I'll decide if he even needs to know ... I have him on a strictly need to know basis). One of my co-workers and I had a "boss alert system" like the terror alert system - as in "He's an orange today, try to avoid him if you can." I have learned to be amazingly manipulative and have been able to get away with murder but still have to defend myself against his irrational and unreasonable blaming (i.e., nothing is EVERY his fault).

The only way anything will change with someone like that is if the higher ups are faced with a direct and clear cost that is greater than the benefit they get from the bad boss. One of my bosses must see the psycho bosses behavior but allows herself to ignore it because she benefits more from working with him than the cost to her of his behavior. When I leave this job (after I've been in a new job long enough to know its going to work out and burning my bridges won't be a problem), I'm going to tell her that the cost to her of continuing to work with him was my leaving (something I think they both live in dread of ... this office can't function without me). It probably won't change things but she will a least realize that her enabling of his inappropriate behavior is costing her.

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Revolution Now!
[Report this comment]
Posted by: WitchyNy on Jul 26, 2007 1:58 PM   
Current rating: 5    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
How about instead- we overthrow the entire system of bosses -and have a worker owned society. Instead of the company owner picking his son- in- law to be the boss. Everyone-every worker- can have an equal share of the company-and can vote for a leader...or just decide everything by group vote.

Better yet, how about a nation of small family businesses.

We can do better than learning how to be- 'good and willing slaves'-for a profit based system.

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» RE: evolution Now! -- LIKE CHINA Posted by: BenCaxton12
that plan's all well and good...
[Report this comment]
Posted by: island___grrrl on Jul 26, 2007 7:54 PM   
Current rating: Not yet rated    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
... but back in a little place I like to call reality, most people who are truly difficult (not just annoying) to work for are simply difficult people whose issues can't be resolved by a "meeting". Either they need therapy (and a lot of it) or they know they have the upper hand and see no reason to change - it's true about power corrupting.

Of course, lack of universal health care or a social safety net mean that people have to put up with these bosses and they never truly feel the impact of their actions. If bosses knew that their employees could walk out the door at any time and not worry about health care and/or could expect some minimal unemployment assistance, I bet you they might change.

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jmp
[Report this comment]
Posted by: jmp3954 on Jul 26, 2007 9:04 PM   
Current rating: 5    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
I'd prefer a John L. Lewis solution.

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Puffin
[Report this comment]
Posted by: Puffin on Jul 27, 2007 2:47 PM   
Current rating: Not yet rated    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
Geez, this advice is treacle. I like the comment about the John Lewis solution. As long as workers continue to be unorganized, there will be no way of really coping with bad bosses.
If you have a union and you have a bad boss, you file grievances, unfair labor practices, EEO complaints if applicable. Using the union structure, you complain as a group and you can get away with it because that's the law (okay, that's the law and you're supposed to be able to get away with it...at least you have a chance.) Eventually things change.
UNIONIZE, FOR GOD'S SAKE, AND QUIT LETTING THE BAD BOSSES HAVE ALL THE POWER!!!

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