NewsQuirks 586

Curses, Foiled Again

A 19-year-old clerk's plan to steal cash from the convenience store where he worked in Shawnee, Kan., failed even though he put tape over the lenses of two security cameras before he called police to claim he had been robbed. He used transparent tape. When police arrived the clerk told them the robber ordered him to tape over the camera, but after reviewing the videotape, Shawnee police Lt. Mitch Brim said it "looks a little fuzzy, but I don't see any robbery in there." Don D. Astorga, 31, was convicted of smuggling a dozen lizards from the Philippines to the United States by concealing them in his underwear. At Astorga's trial, Las Vegas police Detective John Zidzik testified that he approached the defendant at McCarran International Airport because the man had "unusual bulges in his groin area not consistent with male anatomy." Zidzik searched Astorga and found 12 lizards, one a foot long, stuffed into several tube socks in Astorga's underwear.

Government in Action

A $2.5-million project by New York City and I.B.M. to create death certificates online was in disarray six months after its startup, the New York Times reported. The system recorded death dates that were earlier than birth dates and indicated some men were pregnant at the time of their deaths. "We simply don't understand what the problem is," said Wilson Bebee, executive director of the Metropolitan Funeral Directors Association. One day after a gas explosion in New York City killed Leonard and Harriet Walit in their Brooklyn home, city officials sent a letter to the dead husband demanding that he clean up the rubble. "The responsibility to take such action is yours," said the letter signed by Brooklyn borough building commissioner Tarek Zeid, "and because of the severity of the condition, the work must begin immediately."

Big-Time Loser

Zippy Chippy, the losingest horse in the recorded history of thoroughbred racing, put his 0-and-86 record on the line against a human competitor, Jose H errera, 27, an outfielder for the Rochester Red Wings baseball team. Herrera got a quick start in the 40-yard sprint across the outfield grass at Rochester's Frontier Field and beat the 9-year-old gelding by three horse lengths. "I think 40 yards is too short for Zippy Chippy to win," handicapper Dave Mattice told the Rochester Democrat and Chronicle. "If Herrera had to carry a jockey, it would be more fair."

Boot-Scootin' Boogie

Roman Kunikov, an engineering professor at Russia's Ufa Aviation Technical University, announced the invention of gasoline-powered boots, which he demonstrated can attain speeds of up to 25 mph and strides of 13 feet. Each boots weighs 2 pounds and incorporates a 1-foot-long piston that straps along the calf and fires downward, pushing a metal plate away from the bottom of the shoe and lifting the wearer upward. Metal rods on the soles act as shock absorbers.

Beef with Sprouts

Alaska's Supreme Court ruled that Lawrence Allen, a pipeline worker in Prudhome Bay, is entitled to disability benefits because he ate Brussels sprouts in a company cafeteria. The Wall Street Journal reported Allen later experienced severe gastric distress and had to be airlifted to Anchorage, where a doctor found two balls of undigested food obstructing his small bowel. The doctor said the sprouts were probably the cause. The court accepted Allen's argument that the only food he could eat was what his employer served him.

Water World

Thousands of fish suffocated near Golden, Colo., after an employee of Coors Brewing Co. flipped the wrong switch and sent 77,500 gallons of beer into Clear Creek. The Colorado Department of Public Health advised residents to avoid contact with the creek downstream of the brewery, explaining the water could cause illness if consumed. Abandoned coal mines in southern West Virginia are supporting the state's commercial fish farming industry. Water pumped from flooded mines contains low levels of sulfur and other contaminates, and at about 55 degrees is about the right temperature to support fish. "The ironic thing is that without deep mining, the water would not be available," said Mike Whitt, executive director of the Mingo Redevelopment Authority, whose aquaculture facility near Pie raises arctic char eggs to fingerlings.