Conservatives Go Ballistic: Tyson Allows Workers (Even Muslim Workers) to Choose Day Off

"And so, in conclusion: Fuck you, chicken. Fuck you for tasting so good and then betraying us to our enemies."
Well, Tyson Foods and the Retail, Wholesale and Department Store Union (RWDSU) have gone and done it now. They've agreed to a new labor contract at Tyson's Shelbyville, Tennessee poultry processing plant that replaces Labor Day with the Muslim holiday Eid al-Fitr, bringing the total of paid vacation days that cater specifically to the plant's majority Muslim workforce to a staggering one in eight.

Observers on the right are quite naturally alarmed. Rhetorical boycotts of Tyson products are gaining pixelated steam and some disinterested interlocuters have even been forced to reluctantly conclude that it's all Barack Obama's fault.

A closer inspection of the wingnutosphere reveals more selective outrage: