Durst: Louis Farrakhan
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Didn't know how I felt about the Million Man March until I heard that Newt Gingrich was dead set against it. So now I support it, but fervently hope Mr. Farrakhan's diarrhea of the mouth migrates south and incapacitates him all day. A lot of us guilty white folks are twisting and juking like contortionist running backs at a touch football game trying to avoid brushing up against the poisonous prick of the Nation of Islam's hair shirt. The problem is, no matter how far aside you put Mr. Farrakhan, he still ends up slapping you upside the head. After consciously toning down his rhetoric for the good of the event, Farrakhan crawled into the light and called Jews, Koreans, and Vietnamese: "bloodsuckers". Later, he explained he meant it as a good thing. This guy is to tolerance what a barbecue fork is to mylar balloons. Then he referred to black men who weren't participating, "self righteous fools," which sounds a mite ungracious coming from someone who has generously described Judaism as a "gutter religion" and whites as "subhuman." The man just can't help himself. It's a disease. Needs a couple weeks at the Marge Schott Clinic for Serial Insulters is all. Just like charity, Louie, "atonement" begins at home.