AlterNet Readers' 10 Best Comments of the Week

Judging from (most of) your responses, this new feature seems to be a success! We invite you to submit your faves by either "reporting" a comment you like or sending a quick email to Moderator@AlterNet.org.

But enough about us, let's hear from you!

We start with a comment from Eddie Torres. After reading Robert Parry's piece, "Bush Isn't Spying on al Qaeda … He's Spying on You," Eddie decided to help out by giving us "five easy ways to tell if the Feds know you're a terrorist":

1. Do you wear a Casio watch? If the answer is yes, pack your bags -- you're headed for Gitmo.

2. Do you have a MySpace page? If yes, you're busted. Prepare to be dragged out of your cushy classroom at any moment by the Secret Service.

3. Are you studying electronics, computer technology or telecommunications? If yes, you probably also know someone who speaks French. That's a Category 1 / Urgent Priority / Red Flag for federal investigators. Gitmo.

4. Is there a book or a map anywhere on your campus that describes or depicts anything from "Middle-East-North-Africa"? If yes, you're definitely a terrorist. Here's how the Feds singled you out.

5. Do you own a whistle? If yes, you will probably be mistaken for a "whistle-blower" and are at least a legitimate surveillance target.

Now that you know you're a terrorist, do you think the ACLU can help you? Forget it. The ACLU is bugged, tapped, shadowed, keystroked, hacked, cracked and otherwise monitored on an hourly basis by the NSA / DoJ / FBI and 20 other black-hat Fed operations. They're even taunting the ACLU about it.

We have it on good authority that Eddie is contemplating a jump into the blogosphere. Tbogg better watch his back.

Reader newtype_alpha checked out last week's "Iraq Round-Up!" and pondered whether the U.S. effort in Iraq isn't being hindered by "The Dictator's Curse!"…

I halfway suspect that Saddam put some sort of Sufi hex on his Republican Palace, thus dooming any occupier to repeat all of his most spectacular mistakes. Right now, we're seeing the repetition, not of the first Gulf War, but of the Iran-Iraq War in which one totalitarian leader, drunk with power, launched into a war of aggression against another country with the tacit support of the West.

The war effectively bankrupted Iraq, destabilized its economy, cost hundreds of thousands of lives and ended in Saddam's complete humiliation in the eyes of the Arab world … all of which, he ultimately commemorated as a "victory."

Come 2008, look for a giant monument in front of Congress with two M-16s held aloft in giant bronze replicas of George Bush's arms.

Responding to Julie Bergman Sender's "The Republican Plot to Stall Congress, starring Jason Alexander," ssegallmd asked:

What does it say about the American people that Rove and Republicans have planned to obstruct and frustrate Senate Democrats with fillibusters if necessary, then blame them for getting nothing done and expecting the American people to fall for that? What are we talking about, here? Bison?

Who does such a plan work on? Driveling imbeciles, meerkats and the American people. We either should be offended that they even thought that they could get away with something so simple and transparent, or be concerned and in awe of the naivety, docility and complacency of the average American citizen because we know that they can.

How can such people govern themselves? They can't. What could possibly be the fate of a democracy populated by such people? Not democracy. This is whom you have been appealing to in vain for years. Thirty percent still like Bush.

I realize how contemptuous of the American people this post is. But the point is to emphasize what kind of people the left is waiting on to wake up. Do our plans and expectations for the American people aim low enough? When we speak, do they even understand? Do they even hear? How could they? They don't read. They're as simple and unsophisticated as medieval peasants. And just in time, too.