News & Politics
DURST: You Can't Make Stuff Up Like This
April 25, 2000
Where it's all pretty quiet since the members of the U.S. Congress have gone home for the holidays. So make sure you lock up real tight when you're eating your turkey. You can't make stuff up like this:* In Japan, Sumo Wrestlers have been ordered to lose weight to protect the integrity of the sport. Yeah, you know, once a guy gets over 700 pounds, it's hard to think of him an athlete.* Had an awkward moment at the first Bulls Knicks game. It seems Dennis Rodman and Marv Albert showed up in the same dress.* The IRS overhaul reportedly will get rid of the marriage penalty, something the President has been working on for years.* Gennifer Flowers is going to testify at the Paula Jones trial, and you know Clinton can be thinking of only one thing: threesome.* Poor Saddam. Just doesn't get the credit he deserves. The guy's an expert at reducing arms. And legs, and other limbs as well.* OJ's house in Brentwood is up for sale, and you know the real estate agents are primed. "Oh yes, it's very soundproof. From the bedroom, you can't even hear a limo honking in your driveway."* The Park Service spent $333 million on a restroom in the Delaware Water Gap. You know for $333 million, it better zip me up.* I think the Republicans are getting a little picky with Clinton and his videos. Now they're complaining he didn't rewind.Will Durst never unwinds.