DURST: You Can't Make Stuff Up Like This

You can't make stuff up like this. * Now, Kenneth Starr wants voice samples of Monica Lewinsky. Wow, are you telling me, we now have the technology to determine invasive DNA from an audio readout? * George Karl, fired from the Seattle Supersonics, might leave the world of professional athletics and become coach of the Denver Nuggets. * Reports say Viagra may cause vision problems. Probably similar to alcohol. Take a few too many, and everybody looks good. * Baywatch plans on replacing its entire female cast next season. Which puts the pressure on the writers. Not only do they have to write scripts that introduce a slew of new characters, but they have to write them so they can be read phonetically. * Ellen Degeneres and Anne Heche have announced plans to marry. ABC, always on the cutting edge has already given Ellen away. * Pentagon reaction to the female officer who posed for Playboy has been mixed. 20% of the military brass is calling for a court martial and the rest are calling for the proof sheet.* Because production costs have spiraled out of control, Nicholas Cage's no cut contract calls for him being paid $17 million for not playing Superman. I'm thinking of calling up the producers to let them know I'm not available either. They should have called me; I'd be willing to not play Superman for a lot less than that.