The Case for California Secession
Belief:
Are the "New Atheists" As Bad as Christian Fundamentalists?
Frank Schaeffer
Corporate Accountability and WorkPlace:
How a Public Jobs Program Could Put America Back on Track
Julianne Malveaux
DrugReporter:
Pot Is More Mainstream Than Ever, So Why Is Legalization Still Taboo?
Steven Wishnia
Environment:
How an Entire Town Leveled By a Tornado Is Rebuilding Green
Melissa Knopper
Food:
Jonathan Safran Foer's 'Eating Animals' Book Will Fundamentally Change the Way You Think About Food
Kathy Freston
Health and Wellness:
7 Diseases That Big, Juicy Steaks Could Give You
Sara Novak
Immigration:
NYC Marathon Raises Question of Who Is American Enough?
James E. Johnson, Jr.
Media and Technology:
Focusing on Ft. Hood Killer's Beliefs Are an Easy Out to Avoid the Deeper Reasons for the Massacre
Mark Ames
Movie Mix:
The Yes Men: Pranksters Out to Fix the World
Mark Engler
Politics:
Thousands of Right-Wingers Rally at Capitol to Hear Lies About Health-Care Reform, Courtesy of Bachmann and GOP Leaders
Adele Stan
Reproductive Justice and Gender:
Fetus-Shaped Potatoes? Going Undercover Inside the Weird World of Right-Wing Abortion Foes
Ann Neumann
Rights and Liberties:
"My Kids Want to Hide Their Identity; They're Scared Someone Will Attack Us": U.S. Muslims Being Targeted
Jaisal Noor
Sex and Relationships:
"Restless Vagina Syndrome": Big Pharma's Newest Fake Disease
Terry J. Allen
Take Action:
G-20 Meetings: Nothing Much Happened in the Suites, and There Was Too Much Punch in the Streets
Laura Flanders
Water:
Why Natural Gas Is Not a Clean Energy Panacea
Stan Cox
World:
Stop U.S. Meddling; Support Afghan Women at the Table
Jodie Evans
Related Links
The United State of California
Midterm election makes case for secession.
All right, take your fingers away from covering your eyes and stop that sobbing. It's over. The 2002 election, that is. I don't know which was uglier. Bush's smug smile or staying up way too late watching the rest of the country scream at us to eat their dust as they peeled out with an incredibly hard right turn leaving the state of California sitting all by our lonesome as the last remaining residents of Liberalville.
It was de-evolution in action. Like Cro Magnon Man dropping down to all fours and feverishly attempting to stick his tail back on. What you saw was a group of potential survivors vote themselves off the island of progress. We get to stay. Yes, yes, yes, I know, we're the real problem here. Not a single Republican voted into statewide office. We're the ones out of step with the rest of the nation. Out of Goose Step with the rest of the country.
So, why not step even further out. Just split. Leave the nest. 50 - 49 = 1. Face it, they don't like us. And we don't need them. We got the food. We got the wine country to wash it down with. We got the movies, the Disneyland, the Yosemite, the Death Valley, the Sierras, the otters, the Humboldt County. We could use a flag and some money, but otherwise, we're set.
If you ask me, they need us a hell of a lot more than we need them. We miss anything bad enough, we simply replace it. New York? Couple more skyscrapers and Sacramento becomes a major metropolis. Only difference: folks smile and wear shorts. You want gambling? We build us our own Las Vegas located somewhere more conducive to human existence than a desert. What else: you want Chicago? Just dirty up Bakersfield a little.
Why not secede? (Wait, let's encode it so they don't know what we're talking about. C-Seed. Tell 'em it's a new insecticide.) Why not C-Seed? Bush won't stop us. It's not like he'd lose sleep canceling all those planned trips to northern California. Subtract our electoral votes from the equation and his re-election is more secure than cold spot welded door rivets in a glue factory. He could move back to Crawford and nap until November 2004. Let Dick and Condi attack whichever small defenseless country they want. Be easy to sneak the bill through Congress. Call it "USA Bill To Deny Democrats 54 Electoral Votes Every 4 Years."
Remember how the Feds laughingly flipped us off when the Texas energy corps held us down and mugged us for more than $20 billion? You really looking forward to 2-to-6 more years of that? Of California women worrying themselves sick every time a Supreme Court Justice coughs, wondering if this is the end of Roe vs. Wade? Of Ashcroft's stormtroopers contradicting the will of our people by knocking over wheelchairs to confiscate a couple ounces of herb? Bush wants regime change so bad? I got his regime change right here.
With the seventh largest economy in the world we get instant credibility. No disrespect, but this isn't like Alabama or Iowa going solo. Probably rack up new immigration applications like we were giving away free beer at a frat party. You want commitment to environmental protection, education reform, and a woman's right to choose, Californy is the place you ought to be. So they loaded up the truck and they moved to Beverly. Its a win-win. We got a lot going for us. And here's just a couple more examples.
10 Most Bitchin' Reasons California Becoming Its Own Country Would Be So Cool
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Focusing on Ft. Hood Killer's Beliefs Are an Easy Out to Avoid the Deeper Reasons for the Massacre Media and Technology: That alleged killer Maj. Nidal Malik Hasan is a Muslim is not enough to explain the motive for the attacks. By Mark Ames, AlterNet. November 6, 2009. |
Claim: CIA Sent Prisoners Abroad to Be Boiled Alive and 'Raped with Broken Bottles' World: Former British ambassador alleges CIA relied on intelligence based on torture in prisons in Uzbekistan. By Daniel Tencer, Raw Story. November 6, 2009. |
Thousands of Right-Wingers Rally at Capitol to Hear Lies About Health-Care Reform, Courtesy of Bachmann and GOP Leaders Politics: Days before a health bill is expected to pass the House, Republicans rallied their flock with the help of FOX News, Michele Bachmann and leading conservative groups. By Adele Stan, AlterNet. November 6, 2009. |
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