COMMENTS: 122
Why Do Men Catcall?
Sign up to stay up to date on the latest headlines via email.
"I want to show you a good time."
"Oh, man, talk about country thick -- big, round and juicy."
"Looks like candy. Does you melt in my mouth?"
When Angelita, 26, left her home in San Jose, Calif., on a recent morning, she wasn't dressed for sex.
"I walked by the local auto body shop. I was not looking my best. It started out with whistling and vocalizations. These guys were just hanging around yelling at every pair of buttocks that strolled down the street, no matter what they looked like. I just felt uncomfortable."
This scenario is played out multiple times a day in most cities across the world. Men shout out to female strangers on the street, commenting on their looks and do-ability. In most instances, women ignore their harassers and keep walking as if no comment was made. But in this instance (and as part of an experiment I spearheaded), Angelita bravely turned to the group of guys and asked them one simple question: "Why?"
Not surprisingly, the men offered no insight into their behavior. Instead, the group mentality kicked in and they piled on.
"You got a fat ass."
"Your body got me hummin'."
"Got to hold that body."
"For some men, catcalling reinforces their sense of dominance or manliness," explains Yvonne K. Fulbright, Ph.D. and author of Sex with Your Ex & 69 Other Things You Should Never Do Again. "Others may be eternal optimists, hoping that maybe just one woman will actually throw herself at him. Still others do it because they're really just thinking with their dicks, saying the first thing that jumps into their heads."
All human beings who operate within society learn to censor their primal instincts. When nature calls, most people don't just pull down their pants in public, pop a squat and take care of business. We don't leap over the counter at Dunkin' Donuts and start stuffing Munchkins in our faces just because they look good.
So how is it that so many men operate without an "off" switch when it comes to making sexual comments? Is it because by not protesting, we've implicitly given them the go-ahead?
Thirty-something cultural anthropologist Franny runs a Twitter account that is fascinating in its thorough, block-by-block descriptions of the noises New York City men make toward her on an almost daily basis.
"Over years of receiving various catcalls I, like so many women, had become numb to them, so I decided it was time to stop ignoring them, accepting them or internalizing them and put them out there for what they really are: Obnoxious. Ultimately, I hope that this can become a forum for all women (and men) to share their catcall stories," she says.
Recently, Franny began asking the catcallers why they said these things to her.
"The first person didn't answer. The second, who called me gorgeous and asked for my autograph responded, 'Because you look like a movie star.' I know, since I had just rolled out of bed to go grab coffee that I could not have looked like a movie star ... maybe a movie star caught off guard in an awful paparazzi photo ..."
Before starting the Twitter account (and before that, a blog on the same subject), Franny had the idea to photograph the catcallers -- turning the lens on them -- but it proved too difficult to be constantly at the ready with a camera. Another issue was that she didn't necessarily want to stick around to interact with the person who slows down on his bike so he can make smooching sounds at her as she passes by.
While catcalls might seem like harmless fun or the punchline to a construction worker joke, many of the women I spoke to told me that catcalls made them feel uncomfortable or nervous at best. At worst, they left the situation feeling ashamed, angry and powerless, their dignity robbed by a complete stranger.
Brianne, 22, a grad student in Chico, Calif., described an incident that left her shaken up: "It was about 10 p.m. on a Tuesday, it was dark, and I was riding my bike home. I was just about a block from my apartment when a truck went by and a man yelled out the window 'Can I take you home with me?'
"It was horrifying, but I didn't react outwardly. I wanted to yell at him or flip him off, but I know that it isn't safe to potentially make a catcaller mad. It made me feel scared, and angry and dehumanized. I just kept thinking to myself, 'How could anyone think that it is acceptable to yell something like that?' I live in a college town where rape is all too common, but somehow this man seemed either unaware or unconcerned about that fact."
So why would a guy (who most certainly has a mother and possibly even sisters or a wife or girlfriend) deliberately scare a woman like that? Are these men just stupid or evil? Or is there something else at work?
Stay up to date with the latest AlterNet headlines via email
Comments are closed-
Posted by: davy on Oct 21, 2009 2:05 AM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: old teacher
Posted by: buschthebearrefreshing
Comments are closed-
Posted by: mercianomad on Oct 21, 2009 3:05 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
When I was young I was a particularly beautiful guy, and I had lots of girls shouting things at me here and there. It was nice.
Are we progressives trying to create some sort of syntho-behavioral sterile world or something? Sometimes this stuff really is innocuous. It's not like it's verbal rape or anything.
When I bicycled through Thailand, it was common for girls to do this sort of thing ("You're so handsome!"), and it was nothing but friendly and sweet. Then again, their culture isn't nearly as sexually repressed as ours is.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Hmmm. I do hope...
Posted by: cdlepthien
» RE: Hmmm. I do hope...
Posted by: mercianomad
» RE: Hmmm. I do hope...
Posted by: badeggs
» RE: Hmmm. I do hope...
Posted by: mercianomad
» RE: Hmmm. I do hope...
Posted by: badeggs
» RE: Hmmm. I do hope...
Posted by: mercianomad
» RE: Hmmm. I do hope...
Posted by: SaraCole
» RE: Hmmm. I do hope...
Posted by: Joni50
» Sorry to point this out...
Posted by: zipper696
» RE: Sorry to point this out...
Posted by: mercianomad
» So all Thai women are hookers?
Posted by: felipe
» RE: Hmmm. I do hope...
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: kepstein7777 on Oct 21, 2009 3:23 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
I wouldn't want that kind of attention, whether their compliments were sincere, or they were just teasing me for being a dork (the more likely scenario). If I'm on my way somewhere, I don't want to be bothered.
I do like when waitresses or checkout ladies call me "honey." It's more personal, and shows that we're not so bogged down in formality and political correctness that we're all afraid of each other.
I think the extreme aversion to catcalls tends to be a white thing. Based on my reading and observations, "compliments" are more culturally acceptable among latin and black communities. Instead of hurrying along nervously, a black or latin woman is more likely to stop, turn around and say "You're damn right I look good!!! What else you got to say!?!?!"
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Catcall
Posted by: curiousdwk
» From my teens to twenties, I got a lot of this...
Posted by: olderworker
» RE: Catcall
Posted by: chayankhoidream
» Watch the movie "Mahogany" with Diana Ross
Posted by: olderworker
» Its a hollywood movie..........
Posted by: felipe
» RE: Its a hollywood movie..........
Posted by: Joni50
» RE: Its a hollywood movie..........
Posted by: cdmsr
Comments are closed-
Posted by: tlwinslow on Oct 21, 2009 5:07 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Hardwired? Give me a break.
Posted by: cdlepthien
» RE: Catcall or Wolf Whistle?
Posted by: badeggs
» RE: Catcall or Wolf Whistle?
Posted by: Crazy H
» RE: Catcall or Wolf Whistle?
Posted by: badeggs
» RE: Catcall or Wolf Whistle?
Posted by: Crazy H
» RE: Catcall or Wolf Whistle?
Posted by: koolwoman
Comments are closed-
Posted by: cdlepthien on Oct 21, 2009 5:14 AM
Current rating: 5 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: The idea that any woman
Posted by: Jethro2112
Comments are closed-
Posted by: littlepitcher on Oct 21, 2009 5:24 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
And, yes, I spent some satisfying years flaunting my feminism by wolf-whistling at construction workers. Not a one objected.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» Thank god!
Posted by: kateco2
» RE: All things end
Posted by: Ellie F.
» RE: All things end
Posted by: badeggs
» exactly what i was thinking...
Posted by: undrgrndgirl
» RE: All things end
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: Violetflame11 on Oct 21, 2009 6:14 AM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
When I first moved into this neighborhood, the same men that felt comfortable catcalling me used to try to walk by me and grab at my breasts as well. I think the line between catcalling, aggression and violence is very thin. The belching seemed to negate their anger and machismo towards me. It made them laugh, but it got my point across as well.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Belching is effective
Posted by: Jethro2112
Comments are closed-
Posted by: sureshot45 on Oct 21, 2009 6:25 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
i have friends who thrive on the attention from strangers.
and i dont think im the only woman out there with conflicting feelings. you can only control your reactions and attitudes and not those of people around you. if you are insulted, hurt, scared, then do something about it. i have found most men back off when you turn around and make sexual advances towards them right back- they shut up real quick
and good point about it being a cultural thing. i lived in a central american country for a few years, and women were literally insulted if they strutted past a group of guys and did not at least get a whistle.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: depends on the place, time and who is doing the cat calling
Posted by: badeggs
Comments are closed-
Posted by: curiousdwk on Oct 21, 2009 6:49 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
Our society has really disintegrated. i would prefer a society where talking to a stranger, especially with a sincere compliment, would be promoted - not squelched.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: There is a big difference
Posted by: cdlepthien
» RE: Talking to Strangers is Demeaning?
Posted by: pjnaltykins
» RE: Talking to Strangers is Demeaning?
Posted by: Cooltruth
Comments are closed-
Posted by: Smartcookie on Oct 21, 2009 6:53 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
It's little wonder why men are afraid to be teachers (accusations of being a pedophile) or going near any child that may seem lost in public. It seems too many women are turnign their easily offended sensibilities into a kind of warped victimization breeding all sorts of ill effects in society.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Victim society?
Posted by: cdlepthien
Comments are closed-
Posted by: JDAlter on Oct 21, 2009 7:30 AM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
And to the guys who say that it's unfair, that they can't tell what a woman wants to hear/doesn't want to hear, I would say this: when in doubt, keep your comments to yourself.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Huge difference in content
Posted by: luzmejor
Comments are closed-
Posted by: stina723 on Oct 21, 2009 7:34 AM
Current rating: 2 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» Because it would be assault
Posted by: felipe
Comments are closed-
Posted by: JoshM on Oct 21, 2009 7:52 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
New technology has greatly increased access to and mainstream acceptability of pornography, while at the same time feminist activism has managed to clamp down on expressions of sexuality in public spaces (on the street, on buses, in workplaces and college campuses) by defining it as harrassment. (This article is an example.)
It leads to a strange re-distribution of where, when and what sort of sexual expression ends up happening.
I remember a true story that illustrates this well. A young woman was hired to work at a construction site. One day she entertained some of her male co-workers by showing them some nude pictures of herself that she had on her cell phone. Some older co-workers took her aside and told her NEVER to do that again. "Do you realize how hard we had to work to get into this industry and be treated with respect? Don't ruin it for everyone."
This story says something about about the way the two trends interact and also about the practical difference between 2nd and 3rd wave feminism.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Contradictory trends...
Posted by: BCcovers
Comments are closed-
Posted by: ah2323 on Oct 21, 2009 8:06 AM
Current rating: 2 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Don't worry...
Posted by: badeggs
» Really?!?
Posted by: countingdaisies
» RE: eally?!?
Posted by: Joni50
» RE: Don't worry...
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: zaxxon on Oct 21, 2009 8:14 AM
Current rating: 2 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: outland observer
Posted by: countingdaisies
» RE: outland observer
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: stopstreetharassment on Oct 21, 2009 8:33 AM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
It's the kind of entitlement that some abled bodied people may show toward persons with disabilities (ie believing they can push them out of the way if they're in a wheelchair) or some white people may show toward persons of color (how many African American women have had white people think it's okay to touch their hair?). Again, lack of respect comes into play.
For men who think they're paying women a compliment, please answer me why they tend to do it to a woman who is alone (or only with other women) and/or to a woman who can't respond safely or quickly to them (such as men who catcall from passing cars)? Why do they tend to do it in packs or when they are in a more secure position than the woman (again, car example)? Because it's not a compliment and it's a poor way to "pick up" a date. I don't think even the catcalling guys believe that those are their reasons for their behavior - they just say that's why they do it. If they really wanted to compliment a woman or meet a woman, they would say hello in a respectful, non threatening way etc and as they got to know her, they'd offer her a real compliment, not just something vulgar like "nice ass."
Women are not in public for men's pleasure and it's not their right to intrude our space with those kinds of comments.
I research and write on street harassment (including a forthcoming book in 2010ish) and I've found that most women have experienced a scary form of street harassment, such as being stalked, touched, or assaulted. Why do people never focus on that and why men engage in that behavior but instead always focus on the "hey baby"'s?
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: cypriot on Oct 21, 2009 9:04 AM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: vertical on Oct 21, 2009 9:11 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Something Scary!
Posted by: Crazy H
» RE: Something Scary!
Posted by: Crazy H
» RE: Someone's Scared!
Posted by: Crazy H
» Stop bitching . . . I gave you a 5 which brought you up to a 3!
Posted by: countingdaisies
» RE: Something Scary!
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: vertical on Oct 21, 2009 9:17 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
I posted this again because I found a misspelling in the first one
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» Statistics that inflammatory...
Posted by: dbarber
Comments are closed-
Posted by: tanstaafl28 on Oct 21, 2009 9:32 AM
Current rating: 2 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
On the other hand, I suspect that women, who are rightly offended and embarrassed by such behavior are probably secretly a little flattered by it as well, but this doesn't excuse it in any way, shape, or form.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: The kind of men who catcall
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: popsicle67 on Oct 21, 2009 10:07 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Men really do want to run the show
Posted by: Hecate_magika
Comments are closed-
Posted by: Ahimsa on Oct 21, 2009 11:15 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
It is very prevalent in Latin America, for example.
IT nice to hear compliments shouted from the other side of the street,
I guess it depends on what is being said.
Or do we want to protect women from unwanted adulation too?
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Points of view and generalizations
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: linecrosser on Oct 21, 2009 11:16 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: willymack on Oct 21, 2009 11:19 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
Proximity to a pretty woman would reduce them to knee-quivering, stuttering helplessness, at least on a one-to-one basis.
They're basically adolescents in adult bodies who lack the self assurance, confidence in their manhood, and the LOVE and respect for women which mark true adult men.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: daniel347x on Oct 21, 2009 12:07 PM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
To frame this point clearly, consider an analogous issue. It is true that a much larger fraction of black people are imprisoned or jailed for violent crime than the fraction of black people in the population. Violent crime is a terrible thing; however, any article that seriously discusses violent crime and highlights black people as violent criminals would be racist if it did not discuss the influence of the oppression of black people on crime rate and perceptions of black people as violent criminals.
Just so, this article - regarding another oppressed group, poor and working-class men - is classist because it does not discuss the influence of the oppression of poor and working-class men on sexual harassment and perceptions of men as sexual harassers.
Another related issue is important in this context. There are important areas that are not analogous between race and class issues, in my experience. Anti-racists who struggle against violence in society tend to embrace and understand the relationship between racism and violence in our culture. However, feminists rarely exhibit an understanding of the influence of classism on sexual harassment of women. This is striking, and relates to these ways in which racism and sexism are not analogous issues; the ways that they are analogous are described frequently in progressive writing, but the equally important ways that they are not analogous goes rarely mentioned.
Unfortunately, this leads easily to unquestioned and uncriticized classism, and does nothing to restructure society so that it can be rid of either sexism or classism. The two issues, like other issues of oppression, are deeply related and need to be understood together.
Dan Nissenbaum
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: This article is classist
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: dnaylor on Oct 21, 2009 12:35 PM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
People really like their privilege. And they've spent their whole lives denying it. I hope today that at least one guy reading the comments will ignore the ones that make him feel good, and dwell more on the ones that make him feel uncomfortable. That's the only way I ever got smarter. And more egalitarian. Get out of your comfort zone.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: rafaeltoral on Oct 21, 2009 1:07 PM
Current rating: 2 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: rafaeltoral on Oct 21, 2009 1:14 PM
Current rating: 2 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
It's called getting old. When you get there you can rest assured no one will want to look at you.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: To women who hate it when another person inappropriately makes reference to your beauty...
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: mizobe on Oct 21, 2009 2:07 PM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
I worked for a while as a male exotic dancer when I was younger. You ain't seen nothin' until you've seen how women act a bachelorette party!!
I also play in a Rock band.
Anyone who thinks this is simply a male phenomenon is just plain ignorant.
Women as well as gay men have whistled at me, stared at my bod, made sexual innuendos etc. etc.
Even in public I've had women grab my butt...and then tell me they just couldn't resist.
Personally none of this bothers me in the least.
As far as the men who do this to women passing by I tend to think that most aren't very good at scoring points with the ladies, and as one writer said they would probably just stammer and act the fool if they ever got up the balls to make their play toward the object of their desire. As for the women who do this they tend to be very bold and liberated.
Is there a difference? I think so.I think men and women do it for different reasons but they BOTH do it.
Let's face it, ultimately women do the choosing in the mating game.
As for the 50% of men who never get chosen, try to understand their poor behavior. It must be awful for them. They're acting out of frustration and desperation and it ain't pretty.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» Mizobe, I don't agree with your ideas but I do admire your attitude...
Posted by: yellow
» Mizobe, I have an idea for you.
Posted by: countingdaisies
» How big are we talkin here?
Posted by: rafaeltoral
» RE: How big are we talkin here?
Posted by: Joni50
» Agreed!
Posted by: BCcovers
» RE: Agreed!
Posted by: mizobe
» RE: I Get This All The Time
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: ecogazoo on Oct 21, 2009 2:12 PM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: BS
Posted by: cdmsr
» RE: Guess who else was a big catcaller
Posted by: cdmsr
Comments are closed-
Posted by: pcarlinnyc on Oct 21, 2009 2:55 PM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
Yvonne K. Fulbright. What good is your Ph.D. if you must stoop to this level of discussion "...just thinking with their dicks"
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: rclord on Oct 21, 2009 4:20 PM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
As long as it's just verbal, it doesn't harm you. I agree it can sound obnoxious, but even then letting it get to you is a waste of energy.
There are a millions reasons why these men do it. Maybe they're drunk or stoned. Maybe they're having a bad day. Maybe they feel like joking around. Or maybe they're just bored.
I have lived in big cities for most of my life, and I have come across men catcalling women, including myself, all the time. You just learn to tune it out, and not pay any attention.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» Vive la Différence!
Posted by: 24&somuchmore
» RE: The author is overreacting
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: InsertNameHere on Oct 21, 2009 6:11 PM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
Outwardly, I'm walking by, may make eye contact and smile, going about my day.
Inwardly, Any woman I see I instanly evaluate sexually, if she is within certain parameters determined by my life experience, desires, preferences, etc.
In my head I'm saying... Man she's got a nice ass, or I imagine her naked or whatever. Do women do this? I don't know, maybe some do. I am a man and I am attracted to women. I think we are stimulated visually for the most part.
I don't do anything obvious to make a girl uncomfortable because I respect social mores. There are some girls who would feel uncomfortable if you are obviously evaluating them in a sexual way. There are some who want to be looked at. I respect a woman's personal expectation of safety and comfort while in public.
But I'm still thinking about how good your ass looks in those jeans.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: This post is nothing
Posted by: cdlepthien
» RE: My Internal Catcall
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: exileinla on Oct 21, 2009 7:18 PM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
We spent a lot of time talking about the incidence rate of violence against women and looking at women as victims. It is time for us as a culture to hold men accountable for beating, raping and murdering us. Sexually demeaning, threatening and harassing women (and young girls) in public is part of the larger context of violence against women and should no longer be socially acceptable.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Schrödinger’s Rapist
Posted by: daniel347x
» RE: Schrödinger’s Rapist
Posted by: exileinla
» RE: Schrödinger’s Rapist
Posted by: daniel347x
» RE: Schrödinger’s Rapist
Posted by: exileinla
» RE: Schrödinger’s Rapist
Posted by: cdmsr
Comments are closed-
Posted by: maxpayne on Oct 21, 2009 10:10 PM
Current rating: 2 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: La Colombetta on Oct 21, 2009 10:11 PM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
Don't we have more pressing issues than worrying about the ego of some guy (or guys) standing on the corner with to much time on his (their) hands?
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: Priam1 on Oct 21, 2009 10:35 PM
Current rating: 2 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Why Do Men Catcall?
Posted by: La Colombetta
» RE: Why Do Men Catcall?
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: Kilantra on Oct 22, 2009 12:26 AM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: Nitestallion on Oct 22, 2009 4:42 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
She said "As long as it isn't derogatory or coarse I don't care, but just remember turn about is fair play?" "If I say you got a nice ass in the restaurant honey remember what I told you." I said I surely would and was looking forward to it. She chuckled and said: "You're bad, cool but bad"
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: DaBear on Oct 23, 2009 11:08 AM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
Later in the truck he'd tell me the rule of thumb: If you won't say it in public to your wife, sister or your daughter, don't be god damned sayin' it to a total stranger.
Because after all she is some other man's wife, sister or daughter.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Rule of thumb...oops, sorry about the use of the "possessive"
Posted by: DaBear
» RE: ule of thumb
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: rickiey on Oct 27, 2009 6:47 PM
Current rating: 1 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
Really?
Any other stereotypes you want to promote?
Cuz "men" don't catcall. Maybe "some men you know" but NO men I know. Perhaps it says more about the men you choose to know, than about men in general.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: davy on Oct 21, 2009 2:05 AM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: old teacher
Posted by: buschthebearrefreshing
Comments are closed-
Posted by: mercianomad on Oct 21, 2009 3:05 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
When I was young I was a particularly beautiful guy, and I had lots of girls shouting things at me here and there. It was nice.
Are we progressives trying to create some sort of syntho-behavioral sterile world or something? Sometimes this stuff really is innocuous. It's not like it's verbal rape or anything.
When I bicycled through Thailand, it was common for girls to do this sort of thing ("You're so handsome!"), and it was nothing but friendly and sweet. Then again, their culture isn't nearly as sexually repressed as ours is.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Hmmm. I do hope...
Posted by: cdlepthien
» RE: Hmmm. I do hope...
Posted by: mercianomad
» RE: Hmmm. I do hope...
Posted by: badeggs
» RE: Hmmm. I do hope...
Posted by: mercianomad
» RE: Hmmm. I do hope...
Posted by: badeggs
» RE: Hmmm. I do hope...
Posted by: mercianomad
» RE: Hmmm. I do hope...
Posted by: SaraCole
» RE: Hmmm. I do hope...
Posted by: Joni50
» Sorry to point this out...
Posted by: zipper696
» RE: Sorry to point this out...
Posted by: mercianomad
» So all Thai women are hookers?
Posted by: felipe
» RE: Hmmm. I do hope...
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: kepstein7777 on Oct 21, 2009 3:23 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
I wouldn't want that kind of attention, whether their compliments were sincere, or they were just teasing me for being a dork (the more likely scenario). If I'm on my way somewhere, I don't want to be bothered.
I do like when waitresses or checkout ladies call me "honey." It's more personal, and shows that we're not so bogged down in formality and political correctness that we're all afraid of each other.
I think the extreme aversion to catcalls tends to be a white thing. Based on my reading and observations, "compliments" are more culturally acceptable among latin and black communities. Instead of hurrying along nervously, a black or latin woman is more likely to stop, turn around and say "You're damn right I look good!!! What else you got to say!?!?!"
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Catcall
Posted by: curiousdwk
» From my teens to twenties, I got a lot of this...
Posted by: olderworker
» RE: Catcall
Posted by: chayankhoidream
» Watch the movie "Mahogany" with Diana Ross
Posted by: olderworker
» Its a hollywood movie..........
Posted by: felipe
» RE: Its a hollywood movie..........
Posted by: Joni50
» RE: Its a hollywood movie..........
Posted by: cdmsr
Comments are closed-
Posted by: tlwinslow on Oct 21, 2009 5:07 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Hardwired? Give me a break.
Posted by: cdlepthien
» RE: Catcall or Wolf Whistle?
Posted by: badeggs
» RE: Catcall or Wolf Whistle?
Posted by: Crazy H
» RE: Catcall or Wolf Whistle?
Posted by: badeggs
» RE: Catcall or Wolf Whistle?
Posted by: Crazy H
» RE: Catcall or Wolf Whistle?
Posted by: koolwoman
Comments are closed-
Posted by: cdlepthien on Oct 21, 2009 5:14 AM
Current rating: 5 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: The idea that any woman
Posted by: Jethro2112
Comments are closed-
Posted by: littlepitcher on Oct 21, 2009 5:24 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
And, yes, I spent some satisfying years flaunting my feminism by wolf-whistling at construction workers. Not a one objected.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» Thank god!
Posted by: kateco2
» RE: All things end
Posted by: Ellie F.
» RE: All things end
Posted by: badeggs
» exactly what i was thinking...
Posted by: undrgrndgirl
» RE: All things end
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: Violetflame11 on Oct 21, 2009 6:14 AM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
When I first moved into this neighborhood, the same men that felt comfortable catcalling me used to try to walk by me and grab at my breasts as well. I think the line between catcalling, aggression and violence is very thin. The belching seemed to negate their anger and machismo towards me. It made them laugh, but it got my point across as well.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Belching is effective
Posted by: Jethro2112
Comments are closed-
Posted by: sureshot45 on Oct 21, 2009 6:25 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
i have friends who thrive on the attention from strangers.
and i dont think im the only woman out there with conflicting feelings. you can only control your reactions and attitudes and not those of people around you. if you are insulted, hurt, scared, then do something about it. i have found most men back off when you turn around and make sexual advances towards them right back- they shut up real quick
and good point about it being a cultural thing. i lived in a central american country for a few years, and women were literally insulted if they strutted past a group of guys and did not at least get a whistle.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: depends on the place, time and who is doing the cat calling
Posted by: badeggs
Comments are closed-
Posted by: curiousdwk on Oct 21, 2009 6:49 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
Our society has really disintegrated. i would prefer a society where talking to a stranger, especially with a sincere compliment, would be promoted - not squelched.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: There is a big difference
Posted by: cdlepthien
» RE: Talking to Strangers is Demeaning?
Posted by: pjnaltykins
» RE: Talking to Strangers is Demeaning?
Posted by: Cooltruth
Comments are closed-
Posted by: Smartcookie on Oct 21, 2009 6:53 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
It's little wonder why men are afraid to be teachers (accusations of being a pedophile) or going near any child that may seem lost in public. It seems too many women are turnign their easily offended sensibilities into a kind of warped victimization breeding all sorts of ill effects in society.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Victim society?
Posted by: cdlepthien
Comments are closed-
Posted by: JDAlter on Oct 21, 2009 7:30 AM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
And to the guys who say that it's unfair, that they can't tell what a woman wants to hear/doesn't want to hear, I would say this: when in doubt, keep your comments to yourself.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Huge difference in content
Posted by: luzmejor
Comments are closed-
Posted by: stina723 on Oct 21, 2009 7:34 AM
Current rating: 2 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» Because it would be assault
Posted by: felipe
Comments are closed-
Posted by: JoshM on Oct 21, 2009 7:52 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
New technology has greatly increased access to and mainstream acceptability of pornography, while at the same time feminist activism has managed to clamp down on expressions of sexuality in public spaces (on the street, on buses, in workplaces and college campuses) by defining it as harrassment. (This article is an example.)
It leads to a strange re-distribution of where, when and what sort of sexual expression ends up happening.
I remember a true story that illustrates this well. A young woman was hired to work at a construction site. One day she entertained some of her male co-workers by showing them some nude pictures of herself that she had on her cell phone. Some older co-workers took her aside and told her NEVER to do that again. "Do you realize how hard we had to work to get into this industry and be treated with respect? Don't ruin it for everyone."
This story says something about about the way the two trends interact and also about the practical difference between 2nd and 3rd wave feminism.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Contradictory trends...
Posted by: BCcovers
Comments are closed-
Posted by: ah2323 on Oct 21, 2009 8:06 AM
Current rating: 2 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Don't worry...
Posted by: badeggs
» Really?!?
Posted by: countingdaisies
» RE: eally?!?
Posted by: Joni50
» RE: Don't worry...
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: zaxxon on Oct 21, 2009 8:14 AM
Current rating: 2 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: outland observer
Posted by: countingdaisies
» RE: outland observer
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: stopstreetharassment on Oct 21, 2009 8:33 AM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
It's the kind of entitlement that some abled bodied people may show toward persons with disabilities (ie believing they can push them out of the way if they're in a wheelchair) or some white people may show toward persons of color (how many African American women have had white people think it's okay to touch their hair?). Again, lack of respect comes into play.
For men who think they're paying women a compliment, please answer me why they tend to do it to a woman who is alone (or only with other women) and/or to a woman who can't respond safely or quickly to them (such as men who catcall from passing cars)? Why do they tend to do it in packs or when they are in a more secure position than the woman (again, car example)? Because it's not a compliment and it's a poor way to "pick up" a date. I don't think even the catcalling guys believe that those are their reasons for their behavior - they just say that's why they do it. If they really wanted to compliment a woman or meet a woman, they would say hello in a respectful, non threatening way etc and as they got to know her, they'd offer her a real compliment, not just something vulgar like "nice ass."
Women are not in public for men's pleasure and it's not their right to intrude our space with those kinds of comments.
I research and write on street harassment (including a forthcoming book in 2010ish) and I've found that most women have experienced a scary form of street harassment, such as being stalked, touched, or assaulted. Why do people never focus on that and why men engage in that behavior but instead always focus on the "hey baby"'s?
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: cypriot on Oct 21, 2009 9:04 AM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: vertical on Oct 21, 2009 9:11 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Something Scary!
Posted by: Crazy H
» RE: Something Scary!
Posted by: Crazy H
» RE: Someone's Scared!
Posted by: Crazy H
» Stop bitching . . . I gave you a 5 which brought you up to a 3!
Posted by: countingdaisies
» RE: Something Scary!
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: vertical on Oct 21, 2009 9:17 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
I posted this again because I found a misspelling in the first one
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» Statistics that inflammatory...
Posted by: dbarber
Comments are closed-
Posted by: tanstaafl28 on Oct 21, 2009 9:32 AM
Current rating: 2 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
On the other hand, I suspect that women, who are rightly offended and embarrassed by such behavior are probably secretly a little flattered by it as well, but this doesn't excuse it in any way, shape, or form.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: The kind of men who catcall
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: popsicle67 on Oct 21, 2009 10:07 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Men really do want to run the show
Posted by: Hecate_magika
Comments are closed-
Posted by: Ahimsa on Oct 21, 2009 11:15 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
It is very prevalent in Latin America, for example.
IT nice to hear compliments shouted from the other side of the street,
I guess it depends on what is being said.
Or do we want to protect women from unwanted adulation too?
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Points of view and generalizations
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: linecrosser on Oct 21, 2009 11:16 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: willymack on Oct 21, 2009 11:19 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
Proximity to a pretty woman would reduce them to knee-quivering, stuttering helplessness, at least on a one-to-one basis.
They're basically adolescents in adult bodies who lack the self assurance, confidence in their manhood, and the LOVE and respect for women which mark true adult men.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: daniel347x on Oct 21, 2009 12:07 PM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
To frame this point clearly, consider an analogous issue. It is true that a much larger fraction of black people are imprisoned or jailed for violent crime than the fraction of black people in the population. Violent crime is a terrible thing; however, any article that seriously discusses violent crime and highlights black people as violent criminals would be racist if it did not discuss the influence of the oppression of black people on crime rate and perceptions of black people as violent criminals.
Just so, this article - regarding another oppressed group, poor and working-class men - is classist because it does not discuss the influence of the oppression of poor and working-class men on sexual harassment and perceptions of men as sexual harassers.
Another related issue is important in this context. There are important areas that are not analogous between race and class issues, in my experience. Anti-racists who struggle against violence in society tend to embrace and understand the relationship between racism and violence in our culture. However, feminists rarely exhibit an understanding of the influence of classism on sexual harassment of women. This is striking, and relates to these ways in which racism and sexism are not analogous issues; the ways that they are analogous are described frequently in progressive writing, but the equally important ways that they are not analogous goes rarely mentioned.
Unfortunately, this leads easily to unquestioned and uncriticized classism, and does nothing to restructure society so that it can be rid of either sexism or classism. The two issues, like other issues of oppression, are deeply related and need to be understood together.
Dan Nissenbaum
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: This article is classist
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: dnaylor on Oct 21, 2009 12:35 PM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
People really like their privilege. And they've spent their whole lives denying it. I hope today that at least one guy reading the comments will ignore the ones that make him feel good, and dwell more on the ones that make him feel uncomfortable. That's the only way I ever got smarter. And more egalitarian. Get out of your comfort zone.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: rafaeltoral on Oct 21, 2009 1:07 PM
Current rating: 2 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: rafaeltoral on Oct 21, 2009 1:14 PM
Current rating: 2 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
It's called getting old. When you get there you can rest assured no one will want to look at you.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: To women who hate it when another person inappropriately makes reference to your beauty...
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: mizobe on Oct 21, 2009 2:07 PM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
I worked for a while as a male exotic dancer when I was younger. You ain't seen nothin' until you've seen how women act a bachelorette party!!
I also play in a Rock band.
Anyone who thinks this is simply a male phenomenon is just plain ignorant.
Women as well as gay men have whistled at me, stared at my bod, made sexual innuendos etc. etc.
Even in public I've had women grab my butt...and then tell me they just couldn't resist.
Personally none of this bothers me in the least.
As far as the men who do this to women passing by I tend to think that most aren't very good at scoring points with the ladies, and as one writer said they would probably just stammer and act the fool if they ever got up the balls to make their play toward the object of their desire. As for the women who do this they tend to be very bold and liberated.
Is there a difference? I think so.I think men and women do it for different reasons but they BOTH do it.
Let's face it, ultimately women do the choosing in the mating game.
As for the 50% of men who never get chosen, try to understand their poor behavior. It must be awful for them. They're acting out of frustration and desperation and it ain't pretty.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» Mizobe, I don't agree with your ideas but I do admire your attitude...
Posted by: yellow
» Mizobe, I have an idea for you.
Posted by: countingdaisies
» How big are we talkin here?
Posted by: rafaeltoral
» RE: How big are we talkin here?
Posted by: Joni50
» Agreed!
Posted by: BCcovers
» RE: Agreed!
Posted by: mizobe
» RE: I Get This All The Time
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: ecogazoo on Oct 21, 2009 2:12 PM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: BS
Posted by: cdmsr
» RE: Guess who else was a big catcaller
Posted by: cdmsr
Comments are closed-
Posted by: pcarlinnyc on Oct 21, 2009 2:55 PM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
Yvonne K. Fulbright. What good is your Ph.D. if you must stoop to this level of discussion "...just thinking with their dicks"
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: rclord on Oct 21, 2009 4:20 PM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
As long as it's just verbal, it doesn't harm you. I agree it can sound obnoxious, but even then letting it get to you is a waste of energy.
There are a millions reasons why these men do it. Maybe they're drunk or stoned. Maybe they're having a bad day. Maybe they feel like joking around. Or maybe they're just bored.
I have lived in big cities for most of my life, and I have come across men catcalling women, including myself, all the time. You just learn to tune it out, and not pay any attention.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» Vive la Différence!
Posted by: 24&somuchmore
» RE: The author is overreacting
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: InsertNameHere on Oct 21, 2009 6:11 PM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
Outwardly, I'm walking by, may make eye contact and smile, going about my day.
Inwardly, Any woman I see I instanly evaluate sexually, if she is within certain parameters determined by my life experience, desires, preferences, etc.
In my head I'm saying... Man she's got a nice ass, or I imagine her naked or whatever. Do women do this? I don't know, maybe some do. I am a man and I am attracted to women. I think we are stimulated visually for the most part.
I don't do anything obvious to make a girl uncomfortable because I respect social mores. There are some girls who would feel uncomfortable if you are obviously evaluating them in a sexual way. There are some who want to be looked at. I respect a woman's personal expectation of safety and comfort while in public.
But I'm still thinking about how good your ass looks in those jeans.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: This post is nothing
Posted by: cdlepthien
» RE: My Internal Catcall
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: exileinla on Oct 21, 2009 7:18 PM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
We spent a lot of time talking about the incidence rate of violence against women and looking at women as victims. It is time for us as a culture to hold men accountable for beating, raping and murdering us. Sexually demeaning, threatening and harassing women (and young girls) in public is part of the larger context of violence against women and should no longer be socially acceptable.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Schrödinger’s Rapist
Posted by: daniel347x
» RE: Schrödinger’s Rapist
Posted by: exileinla
» RE: Schrödinger’s Rapist
Posted by: daniel347x
» RE: Schrödinger’s Rapist
Posted by: exileinla
» RE: Schrödinger’s Rapist
Posted by: cdmsr
Comments are closed-
Posted by: maxpayne on Oct 21, 2009 10:10 PM
Current rating: 2 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: La Colombetta on Oct 21, 2009 10:11 PM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
Don't we have more pressing issues than worrying about the ego of some guy (or guys) standing on the corner with to much time on his (their) hands?
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: Priam1 on Oct 21, 2009 10:35 PM
Current rating: 2 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Why Do Men Catcall?
Posted by: La Colombetta
» RE: Why Do Men Catcall?
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: Kilantra on Oct 22, 2009 12:26 AM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: Nitestallion on Oct 22, 2009 4:42 AM
Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
She said "As long as it isn't derogatory or coarse I don't care, but just remember turn about is fair play?" "If I say you got a nice ass in the restaurant honey remember what I told you." I said I surely would and was looking forward to it. She chuckled and said: "You're bad, cool but bad"
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Comments are closed-
Posted by: DaBear on Oct 23, 2009 11:08 AM
Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
Later in the truck he'd tell me the rule of thumb: If you won't say it in public to your wife, sister or your daughter, don't be god damned sayin' it to a total stranger.
Because after all she is some other man's wife, sister or daughter.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
» RE: Rule of thumb...oops, sorry about the use of the "possessive"
Posted by: DaBear
» RE: ule of thumb
Posted by: Joni50
Comments are closed-
Posted by: rickiey on Oct 27, 2009 6:47 PM
Current rating: 1 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
Really?
Any other stereotypes you want to promote?
Cuz "men" don't catcall. Maybe "some men you know" but NO men I know. Perhaps it says more about the men you choose to know, than about men in general.
[« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]
Vancouver's Games Will Be the Gayest Olympics Ever
Trial Begins for Activist Who Fought to Protect Federal Lands from Drilling -- Join the Protest
Starbucks' Cop-Out to Gun Nuts: Customers Served Coffee While Strapped




