News & Politics

DURST: Crack Whores and Sedated Sheep

"Here's an idea. Maybe George W really doesn't know if he did cocaine or not. Maybe he was so cranked out of his mind for such a long time, he simply can't remember."
Here's an idea. Maybe George W really doesn't know. First he adamantly refuses to talk about past drug use, because its "not an issue." Then he issues a statement announcing in effect he won't elaborate but confirms he's been clean for seven years, then he says its at least twenty five years since he put anything up his nose stronger than a saline solution. Beyond that he declines to comment.I'm thinking the reason the dauphin is so fuzzy about the whole contretemps is a fear he was so cranked out of his mind for such a long time, he simply can't remember. We're talking blackout city. Probably has a fuzzy black and white recollection of wandering around various Texas tittie bars (don't blame me, that's what they call them) with crack rocks dripping out of his nose into the cleavages of an assortment of amply endowed exotic dancers while being poured into limousines by a motley collection of hand picked bodyguards, none of whom are currently available for comment considering their bizarre simultaneous demise at the hands of random violence committed by unknown assailants all on the same day.Or maybe the guy made a few mistakes then straightened out. And I'm thinking a majority of us would rather be governed by a real human than a bunch of Dudley Do Rights who never admit actually screwing up. Of course if crack whores and sedated sheep are involved, that's a whole different thing.Will Durst thinks if crack whores are indeed involved, he will consider crossing party lines for the first time since John Anderson.
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