Marriage Equality in Califorina: Why We Can't Wait Until 2012

Love Honor Cherish. Posted October 10, 2009.

Editor's Note: Yesterday we ran a story by Troy Perry and Hans Johnson that argues for waiting until 2012 to take on the same-sex marriage fight in California. You can read that commentary here.

Proposition 8 passes every day, until it's repealed.

That's right. When you woke up this morning, Prop 8 passed, and tomorrow morning it will pass again. Until Prop 8 is repealed by a new ballot initiative, each day will be a day in which the precious right to marry is stolen from millions of Californians -- just as though Prop 8 were voted on again.

Given the pain that Prop 8 inflicts on Californians each day, it's not surprising that every political group that has polled its members on the question has shown a resounding majority support repealing Prop 8 at the next possible opportunity, which is the statewide general election in November 2010.

Nonetheless, a few voices -- most of them activists -- continue to urge that we wait until at least 2012, and maybe longer, to try to repeal Prop 8. They say there's not enough money or energy or support to assure a victory in 2010, and they’re scared we could lose.

However, as Martin Luther King, Jr., said, “A right delayed is a right denied.” In the two years – that is, 730 days – between 2010 and 2012, Prop 8 will pass 730 more times. Lives will be forever altered, and especially so for the young and the elderly. Consider, for example, the following facts:

  ► Kids. At any given time, more than 1.5 million children in California are of high school age -- that is, between 15 and 17 years old. Of those 150,000 are lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgendered. If Prop 8 is repealed in 2010, a generation of LGBT teenagers, and their straight peers, will spend their high school years knowing they can marry someday. If we wait until 2012, they will spend those years knowing that they can't.

► Parents. About 1 million children in California are being raised by LGBT parents. Repealing Prop 8 in 2010 instead of 2012 will give these children a chance to have two more years of the stability that comes with marriage, while they're still children. If we wait, these children willl never recover those lost years.

► Seniors. There are about 4.5 million Californians over 65 years old. Of these, 450,000 are gay or lesbian. In any two-year period, more than 13,000 of those people will die. Thus, if Prop 8 is repealed in 2010, there will be 13,000 more elderly gays and lesbians who will have lived to see their right to marry affirmed by a vote of the people. If we wait until 2012, these men and women will never experience that affirmation.

► Relatives and Friends. Another 1.5 million Californians over 65 have a relative or close friend who is gay or lesbian. Between 2010 and 2012, more than 45,000 of these Californians will die. By waiting until 2012 to repeal Prop 8, we will forever deprive these elderly Californians of the chance to go to their friend's or relative's wedding.

It is not only the old and the young who are affected. Every day that Prop 8 remains part of the California Constitution, we each lose something. And for activists in particular, in whose hands rests the decision whether or not we go forward in 2010, the choice to not go forward -- to not even try -- entails an enormous cost in terms of our collective dignity and self-respect. This is not a cost we are willing to bear.

The “Prepare to Prevail” Letter.

Recently, a letter was circulated in the activist community entitled “Prepare to Prevail: Why We Must Wait in Order to Win.” This letter, which was signed by about 30 organizations, some small and some large, argued that 2010 is too soon to seek the repeal of Prop 8. It gave eight reasons. Here are the reasons, and our response to each:

Point 1: Winning requires full LGBT community support and a broad coalition of allies.

Response: There already is a broad coalition of allies in support of repealing Prop 8 in 2010. Over 30 groups, including Stonewall Democrats, Love Honor Cherish, the Latino Equality Alliance, the Mexican-American Bar Association and the National Council of Jewish Women/California have signed a letter favoring repeal of Prop 8 in 2010. In addition, several activist groups with large memberships, including Equality California (EQCA) and the Courage Campaign have polled their memberships on the issue, and more than two-thirds of each of their respective memberships favor going forward in 2010. Numerous other organizations and individuals also support 2010, and we are all dedicated to building a broad coalition supporting repeal. With that said, there will never be “full LGBT community support” to move forward in 2010, or 2012, or any year. In any political movement, there will always be voices urging delay, and the effort to repeal Prop 8 is no exception. Some activists don’t consider marriage to be as important as others do. Some believe that money and energy should be diverted to other causes they believe are more worthy. Others are fearful that another loss at the ballot box would be a major setback for the movement, or that it would be embarrassing to them personally. Indeed, when the litigation was filed that achieved the right to marry for same-sex couples in California, many people objected to filing the case for all of these reasons. And yet, once the case was filed, the community fell in line behind it. This time, too, we must respect these voices, but we cannot be derailed by them and we cannot allow them a veto power over the aspirations of millions of Californians. We must move forward.

See more stories tagged with: religion, same-sex marriage, 2012, proposition 8, 2010, prepare to prevail

Love Honor Cherish is a grassroots organization dedicated to securing equal marriage rights in California and nurturing a new generation of civil rights leaders.

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