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Sex and Relationships

'The Girlfriend Experience:' Is it Possible There's a Decent Movie About Sex Workers?

By Greta Christina, The Blowfish Blog. Posted May 23, 2009.


Thankfully it's not a romantic comedy or sappy morality play in which the prostitute leaves the business to be with the guy.
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I'll admit I was skeptical. Even biased. When I heard about "The Girlfriend Experience," a movie about a high-end prostitute who provides companionship as well as sex -- and what happens when she gets emotionally entangled with a client -- I expected one of two things.

I expected a) a morality play about the consequences of turning love and sex into a commodity, with either a sadder- but- wiser ending in which the guy just can't live with his girlfriend being a prostitute, or -- more likely -- a happy ending in which the prostitute leaves the business to be with the guy ...

or else b) a wacky romantic comedy, the kind that might star Ashton Kutcher and Sarah Jessica Parker, full of amusing secrets and misunderstandings and cross-purposes that all come to a head at the end of the second act and all get resolved in the third. With, of course, a happy ending, in which the prostitute leaves the business to be with the guy.

I was wrong. It's neither. Steven Soderbergh's "The Girlfriend Experience" is thoughtful, complex, emotionally nuanced, and thoroughly grown-up. It's definitely a flawed movie (I'll get to that in a moment), but it's an interesting movie and is very much worth seeing. And, although the prostitute is the central character, in an odd way the movie isn't really about prostitution. Instead, the movie uses prostitution as a way of commenting on the economies of human connection, underscoring the link between money and emotion in a variety of non-prostitution relationships ... both professional and personal.

Told in a "several days in the life of" format, the story is about high- end prostitute Chelsea (played by adult film star Sasha Grey, in her mainstream film debut), and an assortment of people in her life: clients, other sex workers, her personal trainer, her financial adviser, her website designer, a journalist interviewing her for a story, the proprietor of a sex worker review website, and her boyfriend, Chris (Chris Santos), another personal trainer. While there's no one simple story being told, the central event in the movie happens when Chelsea forms an emotional connection with a client ... and begins to want a relationship with him that goes beyond the pleasant companionship and sympathetic ear she typically provides as part of the professional "girlfriend experience."

The movie is not pure pro- sex- work propaganda. It doesn't shy away from the psychological complexities and downsides of providing a personal, emotional experience for money. But far from pointing a judgmental finger, it uses Chelsea's work as a "girlfriend experience" prostitute to underline the connection between emotion and money in a whole host of relationships.

The clearest example is Chelsea's boyfriend, Chris. Chris works as a personal trainer with wealthy Wall Street types, and he faces many of the same issues that Chelsea does: having to convince clients that he likes them in order to stay in business, needing to maintain both an emotional presence and an emotional distance, balancing his clients' stated desire to hear the truth and what he suspects is their real desire to be flattered and praised, maintaining a friendly and personable relationship with very rich people who he has little in common with and might even be hostile to, not being clear on where or how to draw the line when clients want to shift the boundaries of the relationship and become friends . .. I could go on an on.

But there are loads of other examples as well. When Chelsea sees a customer with another escort, it immediately triggers both a professional insecurity about losing financial support and a personal insecurity about her own sex appeal ... insecurities that are deeply tangled, even difficult to distinguish from each other, and that echo the insecurity of a wife who's supported by her husband and suspects he's stepping out on her. When Chris tells his boss that he wants a promotion and has been looking for other work, his boss replies, "You've looked at other places? After all the times I've helped you out?" ... and their subsequent conversation about commitment to work is indistinguishable from a conversation about commitment to a romantic relationship. When Chelsea works out with her own personal trainer, the physical connection and ease the women have with one another is almost shockingly intimate. When one of the Wall Street jerks says that "I want to know that someone likes me for me. At least for an hour," it's not immediately clear whether he's talking about his escort or his trainer. When one of Chris's clients asks him to go an a weekend jaunt to Vegas, he has many of the same qualms Chelsea has when one of her clients asks her to do the same thing. And when Chelsea meets with a financial advisor who talks about expanding and marketing her brand, there's an unsettling undercurrent coming from the fact that her brand is herself ... an undercurrent that reminds you more powerfully than anything of what musicians and actors and other artists go through to "sell themselves."


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There have always been movies about sex workers
Posted by: joeocho88 on May 23, 2009 2:43 AM   
Current rating: 2    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
AND THEY ARE CALLED PORN!

I am surprised that a liberal publication that presumes to champion the rights of women would let something like this appear here. I guess it is to titillate the fancies of the yuppies who read this.

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Great review
Posted by: disc golf on May 23, 2009 3:19 AM   
Current rating: 4    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
I appreciate the attention to detail and the nuanced approach Ms. Christina took in describing this film. She did a great job!

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Calling a turd...
Posted by: uncertain on May 23, 2009 4:55 AM   
Current rating: 2    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
.. an apple doesn't make it one.

Calling a whore a "sex worker" doesn't make what she or he does any more glamorous or make the people who engage in this kind of behavior any less of a hemorrhoid on the ass of society.

Trying to legitimize a personal choice (one that is as destructive to society as it is to the individual) like prostitution, by calling it "sex work" instead of what it is, is the same euphemization that lets the US government torture people by calling it "enhanced interrogation" or slaughter innocent villagers by calling them "collateral damage".

But then again, I suppose since I disagree with the AlterNet majority opinion, what I say may just be classified as "hate speech".

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» RE: Calling a turd... Posted by: Katie Marie
» Destructive? Care to elaborate? Posted by: DonnaSchlesinger
» RE: Calling a turd... Posted by: davmills
sex workers-and emotional response
Posted by: wleming on May 23, 2009 8:04 AM   
Current rating: 4    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
Ms. Greta's piece is informative but when she balks, because the film did not effect her "emotionally" it makes one wonder whether the blogger shouldn't be wondering about just what emotional experience shes after. Sascha Gray may seem laid back, to be sure, but that seems a good strategy for someone in the porn biz... where over emotional reactions would be debilitating at best. And why no mention of a rampant consumerism that over values the cash nexus-and sells that idea 24 hours a day? In a world reduced to "customers" the only safety is in getting paid.

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Ms. Grey Interviewed
Posted by: dumdumboy on May 23, 2009 8:22 AM   
Current rating: 1    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
This article makes for a good companion-piece with the interview of Sasha Grey that appeared in the recent issue of ROLLING STONE magazine, the one with Bob Dylan on the cover.

In the interview, great care is taken to portray Ms. Grey as a complex creature, one who reads Nietzsche and listens to Throbbing Gristle. She is also seen as being in control of her sexuality - demanding harder treatment from her co-workers, as well as starting her own production company, GREY ART. All of which is, of course, commendable.

However, at the end of the article I, much like Greta Christina's reaction to her acting ability, was left feeling that there was something vacant in her emotional make-up. She seemed to me to be a self-centered rhymes-with-witch. In the article "Co-Manager" Dave Navarro says of her that "When you're near her, you don't know what she's thinking." Which sounds much like the character in the movie. Unlike Mr. Navarro, however, I don't particularily want to know what she's thinking, perhaps because I'm not making money off of her, or perhaps because it's really not all that interesting.

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Not Sasha's
Posted by: JefffromCA on May 23, 2009 9:15 AM   
Current rating: 1    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
best work.

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Emotional Vacancy
Posted by: jonestown kool-aid on May 23, 2009 9:51 AM   
Current rating: 3    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
The lead female in this film, Sasha Grey (aka Marina Ann Hantzis) started in the adult film world at the age of 18. She researched the industry, contacted an agent, and began her career. At her request, her first scene was with Rocco Siffredi in a film directed by John Stagliano (Fashionistas Safado). In other words, she participated in a scene with one of the best known male performers in the world, which was filmed by one of the best known directors in the world at the age of 18. It was a calculated decision, not a coincidence. She even managed to shock many of her seasoned co-workers with her over-the-top performance. This young adult has done more in 3-4 years than many of us will do in our lifetimes (like catching an STD in her very first film, and many times since). But she's also a household name among the under 25 crowd, and fans of porn in general.
Sure she's young, and maybe a bit naive, but she's managed to make very good business decisions and make a name for herself in an industry that chews up and spits out people on a massive scale. A certain degree of emotional vacancy is obviously important if you're in this line of work, and you want to suceed. I haven't seen "GFE" yet, but the fact that this acronym (GFE) is well-known in the world of escort services, combined with the fact that porn generates more revenue than Hollywood it's quite apparent that Soderberg will cash in on this niche market film. Business is business and emotional vacancy is just one aspect of making money... or art.

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» Sasha Grey Posted by: Sekhmetnakt
I love this review
Posted by: BlueBerry PickN on May 23, 2009 11:45 AM   
Current rating: 5    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
MOST EXCELLENT!

I look forward to further reviews & commentaries from her!

really great review & insight.





perspective, people.


THANK YOU!

The Jeff Farias Show: streams FREE & LIVE Mon-Fri, 6-9pmEDT

FREE podcast

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What do you mean by "decent movie"?
Posted by: Alenna on May 23, 2009 3:49 PM   
Current rating: Not yet rated    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
The life of most "sex workers" in America entails kneeling in back alleys (or in cars) and sucking on men's dicks. How would you make a "decent" movie about that?

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» Church Lady alert. Posted by: GuitarBill
» Huh? Posted by: Alenna
» RE: Church Lady alert. Posted by: desmodroid
Boffo!
Posted by: Revolutionary (Direct) Democracy on May 23, 2009 5:27 PM   
Current rating: Not yet rated    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
Sasha Grey could easily become the biggest sensation since Pia Zadora!


FREE AMERICA

BY WHATEVER MEANS NECESSARY

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philg25
Posted by: philg25 on May 24, 2009 11:06 PM   
Current rating: Not yet rated    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
I thought The Girlfriend Effect was very good. I enjoyed it and felt I gained something from it.

What is more exciting is Ms. Greta's review. Now this was exceptional. I had seen the movie before reading the review and I found that Ms. Greta echoed my own feelings and observations but infinitely more eloquently.

I am undecided about anticipating Sasha Grey's next film, but not so Ms. Greta's next review. THAT is something I can look forward to without question or hesitation.

Thank you.

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philg25
Posted by: philg25 on May 24, 2009 11:11 PM   
Current rating: Not yet rated    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
My sincerest apologies to Ms. Christina. Unfortunately, this would not be the first time my brain has failed me. I strongly suspect it won't be the last.

Again, my apologies.

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Left a little cold....like a one night stand, sex with a hooker...
Posted by: RR#1 on May 25, 2009 12:00 AM   
Current rating: Not yet rated    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
High end or otherwise. I haven't seen the movie but considering the casting, I don't doubt it, isn't that a survival mechanism for women or men in the trade. I doubt that a practicing pornographer has had enough time to sort out her "true" feelings from the "manufactured" ones that she presents with every day.
Cheers,
RR

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adult escort
Posted by: petra1 on May 27, 2009 7:03 AM   
Current rating: Not yet rated    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
TheEroticSection.com lists high class adult escort. go to mature section to view or to post an ad.

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antibigot
Posted by: cypriot on May 30, 2009 6:42 PM   
Current rating: Not yet rated    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
There is a widespread prejudice against sex work in our society. Even though it is widespread and possibly becoming more deeply entrenched, there is no evidence to justify it. Sex work is harmless. Sex work is just a hook-up in which money changes hands. People such as uncertain who say that it is destructive are mindlessly repeating the brainwashing they are getting from certain intolerant elements. People in Eastern Europe used to say Jews were destructive to Christian society. It was completely contrary to fact, but that didn’t stop most Christians there from believing it. Only a couple of generations ago in this country homosexuality was widely considered to be destructive. It was a widely held prejudice. Likewise with the prejudice against sex work. It goes along with all the other social neocon ideas like a child needs a mother and a father in order to thrive, and men need wives to tame their bad tendencies and bring out their better side (does anyone remember George Gilder?). If a man gets married because he cannot get sex any other way, that marriage is headed for trouble. This is why we have so much divorce and relationship violence. Those people should never have gotten married in the first place. It would be better for everyone if some people satisfied their needs through sex work.

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I enjoyed this review, even while the flick still is more of the same.
Posted by: Sojourner on May 31, 2009 12:12 PM   
Current rating: Not yet rated    [1 = poor; 5 = excellent]
Everyone who works for wages sells themselves. The only difference is what aspect of oneself is sold.

In my experience as a male, I came late to noticing how many women sell themselves by marriage. That is, marriage is security, for the most part.

The promising message of Second Wave Feminism was that, with occupational alternatives, relationships might be more honest, since women would no longer be economically handicapped. Well, we managed by breeding ourselves to gigantism to make sure employment remains scarce. So one step forward and two steps back.

Until we hear from sex workers themselves, all stories are just someone's fantasy. That's what Hollywood has always been about. Sure, once in a great while something can claim to be art. But it's box office uber alles. I prefer to do my own dreaming.

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