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Daily Caller: Obama is a woman, and women are terrible!

The Daily Caller has anointed Barack Obama the "first female president" because the conservative website thinks he has no honor, is not self-reliant and lacks anything resembling courage -- just like a woman!

But before launching into all of the ways that Obama's apparent failures make him a woman, writer Mark Judge issues a really important caveat: He is not being sexist or defending "caveman morons" by designating perceived ineptitude and weakness as feminine traits. Because H.L. Mencken something something?

No, Obama is not the first female president because he "doesn’t hunt or drink a lot of beer, or curse and belch," Judge says. Rather, he is the first female president because he lacks the "six things necessary to attain true manhood: courage, industry, resolution, self-reliance, discipline, honor, and manliness." (Does that last tautology count as part of the list? Are there actually seven things necessary to attain true manhood? So confused. Woman brain hurts. Give me Dove chocolates, please. Tampons. "Sex and the City.")

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