The 11 Dumbest Things Sarah Palin Has Said So Far

When Sarah Palin was first added to the Republican ticket, the McCain campaign went to almost comical extremes to guard her from press scrutiny. The Alaska governor was hustled through photo opportunities, kept from doing interviews and hidden from reporters at several events. Palin did prove adept at reading from a teleprompter in front of conservative supporters, though, so the campaign mostly had her do that.

When Palin finally made her teleprompter-free debut in an interview with Charlie Gibson, it became clear why McCain had effectively kept his running mate in quarantine: Palin was uninformed and inarticulate; she said embarrassingly stupid things; and she looked at Gibson as though he were pointing a loaded crossbow at her.

Since then, the Alaska governor has done little to dispel concerns that she can't articulate thoughts that aren't preprogrammed talking points. More than once, Palin has slipped into George W. Bush territory with statements so absurdly inane they seem closer to Dada art than standard political speech.

We've assembled the 11 strangest, dumbest, most alarming and most harmful statements to come courtesy of Palin since she joined the McCain ticket. Here is Gov. Sarah Palin, in her own words.

1. The News Makes Me Sad ... So I Don't Watch It

Sarah Palin at a North Carolina fundraiser:

At those times on the campaign trail when sometimes it's easy to get a little bit discouraged, when, you know, when you happen to turn on the news when your campaign staffers will let you turn on the news ... Usually they're like "Oh my gosh, don't watch. You're going to, you know, you're going to get depressed."

Maybe her handlers could put on a puppet show instead -- something fun that allows Palin to maintain her cheery optimism in the face of overwhelming evidence that the McCain campaign has imploded. There was once another politician similarly unconcerned with current events and the news: George W. Bush. That went well.

2. The People Don't Elect U.S. Presidents, God Does

Upon being asked by James Dobson if the McCain ticket's precipitous slide in the polls gets her down:

... [it] strengthens my faith, because I'm going to know, at the end of the day, putting this in God's hands, that the right thing for America will be done at the end of the day on Nov. 4. So I'm not discouraged at all.

... and I can feel it too, Dr. Dobson. I can feel the power of prayer, and that strength that is provided through our prayer warriors across this nation.

Ah yes, the always helpful "prayer warriors," whose appeals to the Almighty actually count for more than the average American citizen's vote. Apparently the next president of the United States will be handpicked by God.

3. Palin Believes in "Divided" States of America

At a fundraiser:

We believe that the best of America is in these small towns that we get to visit, and in these wonderful little pockets of what I call the real America, being here with all of you hardworking, very patriotic, um, very, um, pro-America areas of this great nation.

Palin later apologized for the statement. But her backpedaling shouldn't get her off the hook for putting forth a deeply divisive vision of America. How would conservatives have reacted if, in an attempt to pander to uber-liberals, Obama said "I love visiting the parts of the country where people aren't close-minded assholes"? Probably not well.

4. The Vice President Is Supreme Boss of the Senate

Here's what Palin said when Brandon, an elementary school student, asked: "What does the vice president do?"

That's something that Piper would ask me! ... They're in charge of the U.S. Senate so if they want to they can really get in there with the senators and make a lot of good policy changes that will make life better for Brandon and his family and his classroom.

To be fair, Palin had no idea what the VP does the last time the issue came up, so this is almost an improvement. Except that saying the vice president (who is only nominally head of the U.S. Senate) makes policy changes through Senate legislation reveals an embarrassing ignorance of our government's system of checks and balances. Also, it's a bit disconcerting to hear someone running for VP endow that office with God-like powers over a separate branch of government.