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DURST: The Presidential Awards Show!

"Its awards season again! The "Too Little Too Late Too Short Award" goes to George W. for leaping onto the campaign finance reform bandwagon by the edge of his fingernails. The "Roll Over And Scratch My Belly You Adorable Beast Award" goes to the media for their hard hitting coverage of John McCain. And the "At Least He's Got A Future As A Short Order Cook Award" to Gary Bauer."