Feds Valiantly Fighting to Protect You from Porn

Posted by Susie Bright at 3:59 PM on May 2, 2008.

Deep in the bowels of Washington, a federal U.S. Attorney is watching porn videos. Lots of porn videos. They are looking for crime, they're looking for a cause, a way to bring back integrity to the U.S. Attorney's Office.

Now they've found one: filing an obscenity case against porn legend John Stagliano, and his company Evil Angel -- for "squirting fetish" footage.

You remember what happened to the federal prosecutors under the Bush admin, right? Everyone who was interested in white collar crime, corruption, extortion, and child-kidnapping was told to fly right and start focussing on porno:

Two of the fired U.S. attorneys, Dan Bogden of Nevada and Paul Charlton of Arizona, were pressured by a top Justice Department official last fall to commit resources to adult obscenity cases, even though both of their offices faced serious shortages of manpower. Each of them warned top officials that pursuing the obscenity cases would force them to pull prosecutors away from other significant criminal investigations.

In Nevada, ongoing cases included gang violence and racketeering, corporate healthcare fraud, and the prosecution of a Republican official on corruption charges. In Arizona, they included multiple investigations of child exploitation, including "traveler" cases in which pedophiles arrive from elsewhere to meet children they've targeted online.

Anyone who didn't toe the line, was fired and replaced with one of the Bible College grads who could follow simple instructions.

Yes, but this is old news. What's interesting is that the screening room hasn't shut down. The feds are watching more porn than ever. The ones that freak them out the most aren't the hard cocks, the interracial sex, the homosexual taboos that so often frequented past federal investigations. That's so 80s.

No, the movies they're going after this time, are a milestone in obscenity trials. No one ever used to pay attention to female orgasm in porn tapes before ... it was like Queen Victoria dismissing lesbianism. It just didn't count for them. Dick was all that mattered.

In Milk Nymphos, Storm Squirters, and Fetish Fanatic 5 , the one common element is women simulating orgasm, and demonstrating such by squirting up a storm. The scenes are surreal, they're so inauthentic, but what's remarkable, in legal history, is that the ostensible pleasure on screen is depicting the thrill of female orgasm.

I think we have a breakthrough here. The feds want to make visible female excitement an obscenity.

Tagged as: porn, u.s. attorneys, justice department