Larry Flynt on Republicans Who "Can't Keep Their Pants On"

Posted by GottaLaff , Cliff Schecter's Blog at 1:29 PM on December 21, 2007.

I see England, I see France, I see Republicans with no pants!

In a lengthy, rollicking Vanity Fair interview, controversial pornographer and 1st Amendment "hero" Larry Flynt talks about the "progress" made so far on his million dollar campaign to expose "family values" politicians who can't keep their pants on.

Hold on to your hat.

Flynt also claims he now has evidence about a closeted gay Republican senator who is not Larry Craig. "The other shoe's going to drop any day," Flynt says. "It'll surprise a lot of people that he's gay. And I'll bet you he resigns the same day and rides off into the sunset."

That could be just about anyone. My mind is reeling, my pulse is quickening, my curiosity is piqued.

"Over the summer, when he began talking to me for this article, he dropped three A-list names--a Republican presidential candidate, a well-known Republican senator, and another prominent conservative official--whose peccadilloes he claimed Hustler was on the verge of exposing, hinting at hooker parties and no-tell-motel liaisons," Handy notes. "When we sit down in the fall, these names are off the table, though investigations are said to be ongoing."

Deputy Editor Handy continues:

"But Flynt's investigation of this second senator is at a tricky pass. 'His boyfriend is in a quandary about selling him out. It's really somewhat of a pathetic situation. But we also have other boyfriends that he's been involved with.' These earlier boyfriends are apparently willing to go on the record, and have also supplied Flynt's investigators with corroborating evidence. 'We got some motel records. We got some photographs. They don't involve sex, but sort of romantic walks on the beach and that sort of thing.'"

Aww, that's almost sweet. Almost. See? Not all Republicans are heartless. Hypocritical, maybe. But not heartless. Oh but I kid.

Wait, there's something about a deceased president, too? To be fair, there's some skepticism about part of this story:

"He tells a great story about Richard Nixon's brother Donald sneaking the then president out of the White House in the backseat of a beat-up old Chevy to visit hookers--a story he claims was told to him by someone who had been an adviser to the Nixon White House."

Flynt mocks Nixon, "And he couldn't get it up. And that was the same time he was telling Kissinger to bomb Hanoi. I felt there was a little irony in there: He can't get it up for sex but he can get it up for war."

That last part describes so many in BushCo it makes my head spin. But that's just speculation on my part. Disregard it. It's worthless. Ignore me. It's folly wolly doodle.

Oh and that skepticism? It was about Nixon's impotence.

No comment on that part. Or speculation. Or folly wolly doodle. I've had enough fun for one day.

Tagged as: republican party, flynt, gay republicans, republican hypocrsiy

GottaLaff is a regular blogger for Cliff Schecter's Blog