Black Pastor Comes Out of the Closet, His Congregation Kicks Him Out of the Church

Posted by Pam Spaulding, Pam's House Blend at 1:00 PM on November 13, 2007.

This post, written by Pam Spaulding, originally appeared on Pam's House Blend

Those daring to come out in the conservative black church know that the price they may pay is very high -- social rejection by a circle of people that has always been their support system, their community.

When pastors step forward, either by coming out of the closet, or moving to provide open support for the church's LGBT worshippers, the judgment can be swift and harsh. The Denver Post's Lisa Kennedy takes a look at the dilemma in a lengthy piece that is worth the click. It takes a focused look at the sad perspective of churches that want to remain in denial, willing to cast out beloved leaders if they are gay or gay-affirming.

It had been just a few minutes more than 238 days since Reynolds, on Oct. 29, 2006, had delivered his final sermon as senior pastor of Emmanuel Missionary Baptist Church in Colorado Springs, the church he was born into. His parents, Ledell and Mary, were founding members of the "E," as the faithful call their spiritual home. In 1992, he returned like a character from a Bible passage to become its minister.

The shared journey of pastor and flock came to an end when Reynolds revealed he was a "same-gender loving" man, a designation for gay and lesbian identity gaining favor among gay African-Americans.

..."We've chosen what we believe to be a biblical position," Pastor Cleveland Thompson said over the phone, explaining Emmanuel's decision not to speak about Reynolds.

As for the pastor himself, yes, he fell down. He wept. After he left EMBC, he was adrift. One year into his life as an openly gay man, the 46-year-old preacher would not claim yet to being found.

Conflicts over sexuality are on the rise. And - if Emmanuel can be held up as an example -preachers who wield the church's civil rights tradition on behalf of gay and lesbian people will be rebuffed by their members, if not sent packing.

But in contrast to the predominantly white churches, where the departures of gay clergy have been followed by everything from news conferences to extended homilies to the formation of restoration committees, black congregations are more likely to shed their gay preachers with a deafening silence.

...Those who do push the envelope receive a response as old as the Good Book: God's laws are unchanging; they must be obeyed, not debated.

But debate appears unavoidable. After wrestling to understand his son's coming out in relation to Scripture, the Rev. Dennis Meredith, minister at Atlanta's Tabernacle Baptist Church, challenged his congregation to become more accepting of gays and lesbians. Over the three years since, the church shed nearly 300 of its 1,100 members - and the financial pledges they brought.

Here you will see the depth of the problem -- casting out a pastor not because he was gay, really, but because he chose not to remain closeted.

Sept. 29 of last year, Reynolds couldn't get out of bed. It took him until 5 p.m.

Two weeks earlier, he had taken a meditative leave from his church, but he promised to meet soon to announce his position.

The time had come.

He showered. Got dressed. Looking into the mirror, he realized, "You going to come out tonight. This is it. You got to go," he said.

He went. He offered his resignation. He came out.

A deacon came up to Reynolds after the meeting. "Pastor, I always knew you were gay, but I'm mad as hell you would tell us," Reynolds recalled him saying.

He wanted to remain at Emmanuel till year's end, helping his congregation navigate the roiled waters.

Emmanuel decided otherwise.

Two weeks later, a vote was held. Should Reynolds stay until the end of the year, or go?

Go.

"What I remember about the latter part of the meeting was his mother and father and brother sitting there through the vote," said Hank Watson, Benjamin Reynolds' closest friend and a former church member. "It was like watching their son being stoned."

The programs Reynolds shepherded go on at E, said Emmanuel's Charity. Except for one: the GLBT outreach.

"It's not talked about. It's not mentioned. It's a dead issue. It's definitely not in the pulpit," he said.

From my experience as a former gospel singer and having friends who are currently on the gospel music scene, I believe that the gospel singing culture, in addition to being stalwartly heterosexual, is also decidedly bisexual, avidly homosexual and deeply closeted in seriously high numbers. We hear reports, here and there, of a gospel singer/minister giving sermons against homosexuality, and after the sermon handing out his hotel keys to men he wants to pursue for that evening. We hear reports of two nationally known, famous gospel singing homophobes who are actually lovers.

An openly gay minister in Washington DC relates the story of going to gospel music events and hearing homophobic remarks from the stage in the daytime, and yet some of those same clergy and gospel singers knock on his door at night.

We know of the closeted lesbians. We know who is gay in gospel and who is not. How do we know? They ask our un-closeted gospel singing friends for sex. Or their bitter wives spill the beans. Or they protest wa-y-y too much, which is a behavior that healthy heterosexuals don't engage in.

Tagged as: religion, african americans, homophobia, religious conservatives, black churches

Pam Spaulding blogs at Pam's House Blend.