Marines declare war on Christmas

Posted by Melissa McEwan at 12:38 PM on November 14, 2006.

Why do the Marines hate America?

A talking Jesus doll has been turned down by the Marine Reserves' Toys for Tots program.

A suburban Los Angeles company offered to donate 4,000 of the foot-tall dolls, which quote Bible verses, for distribution to needy children this holiday season. The battery-powered Jesus is one of several dolls manufactured by one2believe, a division of the Valencia-based Beverly Hills Teddy Bear Co., based on Biblical figures.

Why is the phrase "battery-powered Jesus" making me laugh uncontrollably?

Anyhoo, the vice president of Marine Toys for Tots Foundation, Bill Grein, said that toys are distributed to children based on financial need and "we don't know anything about their background, their religious affiliation," so they rejected the donation, lest they risk "sending a talking Jesus doll to a Jewish family or Muslim family." Grein also noted, rather amusingly, that "kids want a gift for the holiday season that is fun." What -- and a battery-powered doll designed for religious indoctrination isn't fun?!

Michael La Roe, director of business development for [one2believe and Beverly Hills Teddy Bear Co.], said the charity's decision left him "surprised and disappointed."

"The idea was for them to be three-dimensional teaching tools for kids," La Roe said. "I believe as a churchgoing person, anyone can benefit from hearing the words of the Bible."

Well, Mr. La Roe, I hate to surprise and disappoint you further, but that's probably only one of many beliefs that you don't share with everyone in America.

(Crossposted at Shakespeare's Sister.)

Tagged as: war on christmas

Melissa McEwan writes and edits the blog Shakespeare's Sister.