Atheist Group Offers to Take Care of Christians' Pets After the Rapture

Posted by Tara Lohan, AlterNet at 1:27 PM on September 2, 2009.

I'm honestly not sure what Earthbound Pets really is -- probably the biggest hoax on the internet, but one thing is sure -- it is hilarious. Here's the premise: "You've committed your life to Jesus. You know you're saved. But when the Rapture comes what's to become of your loving pets who are left behind? Eternal Earth-Bound Pets takes that burden off your mind."

This sounds fantastic -- after all, when the rapture comes, there is probably going to be a lot of things on your mind. Really, what does one even pack? So it's nice to get arrangements for your pets, who apparently will spent eternity with the atheists and gays and gay atheists, all sorted out before hand.

Here's more from their site:

We are a group of dedicated animal lovers, and atheists. Each Eternal Earth-Bound Pet representative is a confirmed atheist, and as such will still be here on Earth after you've received your reward. Our network of animal activists are committed to step in when you step up to Jesus.

We are currently active in 20 states and growing. Our representatives have been screened to ensure that they are atheists, animal lovers, are moral / ethical with no criminal background, have the ability and desire to rescue your pet and the means to retrieve them and ensure their care for your pet's natural life. ...

Our service is plain and simple; our fee structure is reasonable. For $110.00 we will guarantee that should the Rapture occur within ten (10) years of receipt of payment, one pet per residence will be saved. Each additional pet at your residence will be saved for an additional $15.00 fee. A small price to pay for your peace of mind and the health and safety of your four legged friends.

Surely, it seems this is some sort of joke, although their FAQs claim otherwise. One can only hope that very gullible Christians have sent in their money. At least it will be going to a good cause.

Tagged as: religion, christians, pets, atheism, rapture

Tara Lohan is a managing editor at AlterNet.