The Onion: Diebold Accidentally Leaks Results of '08 Election | AlterNet

Corporations and Work

Advertisement

Advertisement

Advertisement

Advertisement

Register to Vote: Rock the Vote, powered by Working Assets Wireless

Advertisement

AlterNetYour turn

Support AlterNet
Do you value the information you're getting from AlterNet? Please show your support with a tax-deductible donation.

Feedback
Tell us how we're doing.

The Onion: Diebold Accidentally Leaks Results of '08 Election [VIDEO]

Posted by Manila Ryce, The Largest Minority at 4:49 AM on February 28, 2008.

For those of you who have been keeping up with the election, this clip contains spoilers.

Post Tools
EMAIL
PRINT
14 COMMENTS

The Onion: Diebold Accidentally Leaks Results of '08 Election

Share and save this post:

Got a tip for a post?:
Email us | Anonymous form

Manila Ryce RSS Feed

Main AlterNet RSS Feed

Warning: For those of you who have been keeping up with the election, this clip contains spoilers.

Someone’s gotta protect us from democracy when the representatives, delegates, superdelegates, and electoral college aren’t enough. Despite Diebold’s electronic voting machines prematurely revealing the winner of the general election, the sham must go on. Try and act surprised.

Check out the video to your right for more.

Manila Ryce is a regular blooger for The Largest Minority

Return to Manila Ryce » Post Tools: EMAIL PRINT 14 COMMENTS PERMALINK

Also by Manila Ryce
Pakistan May Turn Over US-Supported Terrorists to Iran The CIA denies any connection between Jundullah and the US government. June 3, 2008.	US Using Prison Ships for Detention of Suspects Since 2001, the US has deployed at least 17 prison ships to hold detainees in the "war on terror." June 2, 2008.	Biofuel is Still a Stupid Idea Cellulosic ethanol is not all it's cracked up to be. May 13, 2008.	New Study Shows Genetically Modified Crops Produce Less Frankenfoods aren't so miraculous after all. May 9, 2008.	Chris Hedges Warns of Dangerous Threat Posed by Fundamentalist Atheism Hedges warns that the quest to forcibly bring Muslims into "reason" is identical to the fundamentalist preachers who call for a new Christian crusade. April 11, 2008.

Comments	Turn comments off sitewide	Give us feedback »
Comments closed. The comments for this story have been closed. Thank you to everyone who participated.		View:
brilliant [Report this comment] Posted by: KaptainSpiffy on Feb 28, 2008 5:09 AM Current rating: 3 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent] cynical and humorous. what a combination [« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5] It wouldn't be so funny ... [Report this comment] Posted by: sliver on Feb 28, 2008 5:20 AM Current rating: 5 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent] ...if it weren't so true. [« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5] Max Headroom redevivus [Report this comment] Posted by: halrivers on Feb 28, 2008 6:12 AM Current rating: 5 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent] I believe there was a line in the seminal Max Headroom TV show (15 minutes into the future) where a political candidate exclaimed, "They can't do that! We negotiated the results of that election 6 months ago!" Now, back to sleep. [« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5] Yahshu [Report this comment] Posted by: yahshu on Feb 28, 2008 7:02 AM Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent] If this is proven to be true, then let the REVOLUTION begin! [« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5] Perfect [Report this comment] Posted by: nochicagoboys on Feb 28, 2008 7:34 AM Current rating: 4 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent] So, which will be the bellwether state this time around? Move over Florida and Ohio, you've had your turn. Great piece. [« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5] Diebold Uber Alles [Report this comment] Posted by: LeftCoastProgressive on Feb 28, 2008 7:43 AM Current rating: 5 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent] Diebold's new motto: ELECTIONS ARE US. The cutting edge Sham Vote Counter software Diebold has been working on should get them into the ground floor action first. Diebold has had to add a complete wing to their headquarters to accomodate the new Sham Vote Counter software development. They have a large request for graphics and software engineers. Foreign business is up since the devaluation of the dollar. The new and burgeoning Department of Faked Asassinations is ready to accomodate VPs and Presidents who want to disappear themselves to avoid World Court lawsuits over genocide and pillaging. It's a promising new area of business! [« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5] Its Funny That Some People May Think This Is a Parody... [Report this comment] Posted by: magistre on Feb 28, 2008 8:55 AM Current rating: Not yet rated [1 = poor; 5 = excellent] We know it is true so far as it goes but it does not talk about the take-over by Der Fuerer so he doesn't have to make a lame excuse for another term. [« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5] oh so sad [Report this comment] Posted by: grethart on Feb 28, 2008 9:37 AM Current rating: Not yet rated [1 = poor; 5 = excellent] what a very sad state of affairs.... [« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5] I didn't realize it WAS a parody [Report this comment] Posted by: Ellie1 on Feb 28, 2008 10:05 AM Current rating: 5 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent] for a minute or so. Shows how cynical i have become. I have been imagining an assasination attempt for over 7 years! Wishful thinking.(I didn't say on who). [« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5] The Simulacra [Report this comment] Posted by: andrewstromotich on Feb 28, 2008 10:54 AM Current rating: Not yet rated [1 = poor; 5 = excellent] in the brilliant Philip K Dick novel, THE SIMULACRA, america is seen in 2050, 50 years after the end of democracy. In the year 2000, the president was replaced by a android built by a corporation, and television has become a state sponsored passtime. everyone knows that the president is not real, but they continue to vote anyways, which creates a collective psychosis (tell a big enough lie long enough and it becomes the basis of a new very unstable truth)... the guise is finally shed (the emperor has no clothes!), as a rival corporation goes to war with the one that owns the president simbot. The military sides with one corp, the police with the other, and a civil war breaks out, with the result of america perishing in in nuclear holocaust. he wrote that in 1968 [« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5] While They're At It, Maybe We Should Ask the Onion... [Report this comment] Posted by: gazooks on Feb 28, 2008 11:50 AM Current rating: Not yet rated [1 = poor; 5 = excellent] ...to announce our withdrawal from Iraq, the resignation of Bush/Cheney, the suddenly balanced budget due to an audit error, the new peaceful state of Palisrael, a cold fusion breakthrough, and a universal imuno-cure; reefer w/a nice Sauvignon Blanc taken in sunny salt air. What the hell. [« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5] Ahhh... [Report this comment] Posted by: Susan Kipping on Feb 28, 2008 5:54 PM Current rating: 5 [1 = poor; 5 = excellent] Finally. News I can watch. [« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5] Terrorist [Report this comment] Posted by: HeKnew on Feb 29, 2008 4:16 AM Current rating: Not yet rated [1 = poor; 5 = excellent] Direct Primaries! Direct Elections! Direct Democracy! [« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5] For serious study of the problem, see... [Report this comment] Posted by: Namorado_TX on Mar 8, 2008 6:15 PM Current rating: Not yet rated [1 = poor; 5 = excellent] http://blackboxvoting.org — a non-partisan organization which has archives of information on Diebold and other companies going back several elections. Many concerned people have aided in the research, and have monitored polling places for BBV. Irregularities have turned up all across the nation. Here's a couple other useful voting-related links: first, my favorite IRV voting site (Instant Runoff Voting saves taxpayer money by eliminating a need for runoff elections, removes some of the incumbent advantage in left-over funds to be used in a runoff, and most-importantly, allows the voter to rank as a first-choice their favorite candidate without fear they'd be supporting a "spoiler" to the probable winner, often "the lesser of two evils"). Go to http://rangevoting.org for an explanation of how it works. Secondly, the only political party promoting IRV nationally is The Green Party. An eloquent speech by one of the candidates for the GP Presidential race is by Cynthia McKinney, who explains why this party is worthy of your vote. Go to http://runcynthiarun.org [« Reply to this comment] [Post a new comment »] [Rate this comment: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5]