GOP Legacies: Bush, McCain, Stevens

Posted by Steven Reynolds, The All Spin Zone at 4:11 AM on November 18, 2008.

This isn’t about the legislative accomplishments of these three GOP posterboys for corruption and ineptitude, but about what future generations will make of them. Even Chester A. Arthur had schools named after him. They could ironically rename K Street for McCain, or rename earmarks as “Stevenses?” Bush, of course, will get a Hurricane.

What will the legacies be for three of the most powerful Republicans over the last dozen years or so? That’s pretty easy to figure out, surely. Bush will be remembered for torture and spying on his own citizens, for perverting our system of justice and for getting us into a war on false pretenses. Heck, Bush is himself looking for even more ways he can ruin the country before he can leave office. McCain will be remembered for campaign finance reform that is already obsolete, and for the rash and reckless campaign he ran this year. Stevens, of course, will be remembered for the extreme positions he held, for his corruption, and for signing a hat. But I’m talking of neither corruption nor accomplishments here. I’m wondering what public structures will be named for them.

Bush? So far he’s got a school named for him in Stockton, CA, and a road in Waco, TX, according to the Seattle Times. That’s it. That’s how I predict it will remain. In California they failed to name a sewage plant for him, maybe figuring the plant was too valued by the community to take that name. But you can all suggest other honors for Mr. Bush. A hurricane in his name would be nice. That’s too easy. Please, one of you give a shot at this one.

Ted Stevens is easier, I suppose. Jim DeMint of the Repubs has already called for Stevens to resign, whether he wins against Begich or not. Maybe we could name a fish statue after him. The guy has become pathetic. Though he knows that his conviction means he automatically loses his license to practice law, Stevens and his team are going to fight that action. Hey, maybe the Republicans will oust him from the Party altogether, and that action will be named something like “getting Stevensed.” It would be an exciting action, the Republicans actually recognizing the corrupt practices of one of their own, so such a naming would likely go down in history.

McCain? He’s already got his name on the McCain Feingold campaign finance reform laws, but this election and the last couple have shown how inadequate those laws are. Perhaps McCain can replace Wilbur Mills in history for his relationship with Sarah Palin? Well, the “brain-dead” fits, though the relationship doesn’t. How about if we rename the act of suspending a campaign in dramatic drama queen fashion “pulling a McCain?” Nah, that’s just too easy. Let’s just rename the angry stuff, like Ed here represents, like yelling at kids for getting on the lawn, an act of McCainity. Again, I’m sure the readers here can come up with something good.

Steven Reynolds is a regular blogger for the All Spin Zone