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Artificial Virginity Hymen: Faking that Vacuum-Fresh Seal
I'm not really sure what to say about this, other than if he wants to re-live you losing your virginity in all of its blood-oozing glory, or if you have to fake losing it to please him, dump the motherfucker already:
A reader tipped us off to the "Artificial Virginity Hymen", which the company, Gigimo, claims "will expand a little and make you feel tight." The hymen also includes a packet that is activated during sex, which will "ooze out a liquid that look like blood not too much but just the right amount." As if that wasn't horrifying enough, the company claims, "Add in a few moans and groans, you will pass through undetectable."
Unfortunately for us ladies, the "artificial virginity hymen" doesn't come with an "artificial virginity penis" that jackhammers for 22 seconds before shrivelling and passing out next to you in the backseat of his parents' car.
I’ll also add that, sad as it is, a fake hymen could be potentially helpful to women who face serious consequences for not appearing to be virgins on their wedding nights. And at least it’s less invasive than hymen surgery. (Typing that sentence makes me want to cry and/or break something).
Jill Filipovic is a New York-based freelance writer and a law student at NYU. More of her writing is available online at her blog, Feministe.
| Also by Jill Filipovic | ||||
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Everyone's Talking About Stupak, But What About the Health Care Bill's More Insidious Features? The current bill involves some quietly coercive (and racist) provisions that no one wants to mention. November 24, 2009. |
Is Taxing Plastic Surgery Sexist? Part of the funding for the Senate's health care bill will come from a 5 percent tax on cosmetic surgery, on procedures overwhelmingly obtained by women. November 23, 2009. |
So the Stupak Amendment Sucks: Here's What You Can Do About It Find out how your representative voted on and call their office, to thank them or to tell them that you'll be supporting a pro-choice democrat in the next primary. November 10, 2009. |
Word to the Wise: Never Date a Guy Who Reads Details Magazine A few experts discuss the "trend" of women tricking men into impregnating them, without offering any hard information or statistics. October 28, 2009. |
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